The Lost Art of Good Conversation: A Mindful Way to Connect with Others and Enrich Everyday Life

by Sakyong Mipham

Our minds are neutral and we can direct them in any way we want. The words we speak come out of our intention. In fact, we are already training our minds all day, every day. However, unintentionally we are training them to get angry, jealous, fearful, and fixated. With these unhealthy emotions, we build a wall of stress that separates us from others. When we are polarized by opinion and hardened by stress, we can’t feel.

After some time, I came to the realization that not all conversations need a point.

Vulnerability and heartbrokenness are actually human strengths.

However, especially in an age of coarsening values, it is hard to feel our natural kindness because it is often blocked by reactionary emotions. This occurs when we divide the world into us versus them. Then the more we forget our kindness, the more unkindness there is, and the more we forget.