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I wasn’t born like the rest. I had an illness. Sometimes I conquered it. Sometimes it conquered me. Everyone’s favorite Rose was wilting, but no flower wants to die in front of an audience.
“Contrary to general belief, stars don’t twinkle. There is only one star that sparkles that scientists can agree on. It twinkles so bright, sometimes people mistake it for a UFO. It’s not big, but it stands out. That’s Sirius, and it’s also you. You shine, Baby LeBlanc. So fucking bright sometimes you’re the only thing I see.”
“I don’t want to make you forget. I want to make you remember. And I’m about to, Rosie.” He breathed hard against my skin. “I’m about to rewrite the pages of our fucking history, baby.”
he was my sun, the moon, and everything worth seeing in the constellation.
He placed it over my heart, and squeezed one time. “This thing right here? It fucking beats for me. You know it. I know it. Keep lying, Rosie. I’ll milk the truth out of you. One way or the other.”
“This thing right here? It fucking beats for me. You know it. I know it. Keep lying, Rosie. I’ll milk the truth out of you. One way or the other.”
Love felt like dipping each other in gasoline and burning together. Love felt like dancing with madness in the dark, watching all of its bright lights. Love felt like gasping for air when your lungs were already full.
He wasn’t Sirius. He was planet Earth. He was oxygen. He was everything. I allowed his face to disappear inside my shoulder and embraced him until there was no more space between us. We melted into each other, his heartbeats against my skin, my hair in his nose, his fingers on my waist.
And I cried for me, because I knew, right there and then, that a part of me was already his despite my best efforts. I never stopped loving Dean Cole. Not even for one damn moment. I just convinced myself that I stopped caring. Until I didn’t. Until now.
We hadn’t had time to talk to each other all day, and I missed her like a fucking lung. Lungs. Her lungs were failing her every single day, and we were wasting days mostly apart. I wasn’t sure how much longer I could live without seeing her regularly, every day, at least a few hours a day.
you kidding me here? I don’t like you. I love you. Even that’s an under-fucking-statement. I live for you. I breathe for you. I will die for you. It. Has. Always. Been. You. Ever since I saw your sorry ass for the first time on that threshold and you fucking poked me in the chest like I was a toy. We’ve been apart for ten years, Rose LeBlanc, and not even one day has passed without me thinking of you.
Real talk, Rosie, you are all I ever wanted. Even when you wanted me to be with your sister. She was a comforting candle. You were the dazzling sun. I’d lived in the dark—for your selfish ass. And if you think I’m going to settle for something, you’re dead wrong. I am taking everything. We will have kids, Rose LeBlanc. We will have a wedding. And we will have joy and vacations and days where we just fuck and days where we just fight and days where we just live. Because this is life, Baby LeBlanc, and I love the fuck out of you, so I’m going to give you the best one there is. Got it?”
“We’re getting married,” I stated, not asked. “Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but we are. And we’re having kids. At least two. Maybe more. I haven’t decided yet.” “You’re crazy, Dean Cole.” “I am,” I agreed. “And yet, this crazy train is in motion. You can’t stop it.” “I love you.” “Forever starts now, Baby LeBlanc. With you.”
You are going to die. Disappear. Suffocate, in a grave. He will move on. And find another girl. He will move on. And it won’t be you. He will move on. But it won’t hurt. Nothing will anymore. Because…you’ll be gone.
I am and still chose to have a baby with me is an even bigger one. But Dean…Dean is not Vicious. Dean made a mistake, not a conscious decision to hurt her. And he deserves to be heard.”
“Rose!” Her eyes closed, the door opened, the sound on her monitor went off, and my heart disintegrated. Piece. By piece. By piece.
“He’s wearing a goddamn multi-colored blazer. It’s Knight, all right.”
He is my mini-me on steroids. Swag, attitude, and mischief all wrapped up in an innocent smile.
didn’t trust any fucking machine other than the beating organ in my chest—
“Did you ever check on your mom?” I ask Knight. “Yeah. She said she is good. She also said that she loves me more than she loves you.” I narrow my eyes. “She did not.” “Did too.” Knight shrugs, wiping the sweat from his forehead. “Bull…’s head.” I clear my throat. Knight jumps and high-fives Vaughn. “Told you I’d get him to say a bad word! I’m goooood.” He is good, and I am blessed. And whole. And fucking alive. Thanks to her.
Dean walks over, flattens his palm against my huge belly, and sits down beside me. “Hey, Sirius?” “Yes, Earth?” “Why do you shine so fucking bright? You make it hard for me to sleep next to you.”
Now is forever, at least for me. For I am not a wilting Rose, I’m in full bloom. Thanks to him.
