THERE IS THIS IMPOSSIBLE PARADOX WHEN YOU ARE VICTIMIZED by sexual assault. You want to—you have to—convince yourself that it wasn’t “that bad” in order to have any hope of healing. If it really is as bad as you feel like it is, how will you ever get out from under it? How will you ever get “better”? On the other hand, you need to convince others it was “bad enough” to get the help and support you need to do that healing. To get out from under it. To get an appointment at the clinic. To get friends to come over with Styrofoam food containers when you can’t feed yourself. You tell yourself how
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