Now That You Mention It

by Kristan Higgins

And as I talked, events began to shape themselves to my words.

If we could go back to how things had been...

I took a defiant sip of my wine.

There was no threat to me. I could relax. I was fun. I was brave and smart.

I pulled a face, trying to make light of it.

fleeting and all the sweeter because of it.

I was only temporary here.

Oh. My heart dropped a few inches. “No problem.

Okay.

Even so, it threw me a little. Still, it was a beautiful day in Boston.

after the thrill of being noble faded, he got bored,”

I hate shaky ground.”

trying to squash my not-so-sweet thoughts

a little sorry to be leaving,

You wonder how much abuse you can take and still love someone. You wonder how long they can treat you like nothing but still want them back. You wonder how many years it will take to forget how things used to be, how long you’ll burn yourself with that tiny ember of hope before the deluge of their neglect drowns it. A long time, in my case. A long, lonely time.

Dogs. The best work God had ever done.

(pause for laughter).

I shrugged, a little embarrassed (and secretly thrilled).

“I’m sorry. I missed everything you just said.” Just as well, since I was babbling.

the quiet floated down around us again.

“Excuse me?” he said, and yeah, yeah, I was glad he was hearing impaired. Sue me. “Nothing,” I said. “Good night. Yeah. Have a safe trip home. Back to your house, I mean.

And being a schmuck, I said yes.

it felt better to be doing something.

I sighed with relief. Thank God for female friends.

“Um...I don’t know. I was on autopilot, I guess.”

“Okay. Yes. Sure. Yeah.” I took a breath and told myself to calm down. “Now that I’ve given you four affirmative answers, I think I can go.”

She felt so familiar—her

The sun was still shining, and the air was clean and clear.

What was I, invisible?

Message received. Just not expected.

I also took my kettle, thank you very much,

Well, whatever.

He laughed, and then I felt something stir in my belly, a lovely warm squeeze of attraction.

This was not how things usually went with me. Not to brag, but I used to be kind of adorable.

“It’s better this way.” It just didn’t feel like it.

and she grimaced and brightened at the same time.

Healthy Looks Different on Everyone.

“So!” I said brightly.

He laughed again, and it was such a turn-on, low and dirty, like he knew all my secrets. Which he probably did.

The one who—let’s face it—had been playing a part for a long time.

Not completely; there were things about my Perez self that were genuine. But God, it had been so much work, that person in Boston!

This was where we were meant to be.

The pine-salt air felt so good to breathe. The tide was high, the water calm, baby waves lapping at the edges of the cove, the wind rustling the long grass of the meadow.

I looked up at the sky, so blue and clear today.