And still, these silly classes I took make up what turns out to be my higher education. It will always be a part of what I am, things happen and then fall away, it’s no less permanent than what happens in a match. I have to live with all of it. And lately, twenty-one years of living with things has begun to wear thin. Eighteen years of living with it, then graduating to three more years of living with it, where all you do is live with it. I’m up to my neck in it, I’m stuck with all this history and it never leaves me alone. It’s enough to make you imagine what could’ve been different, to make
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