Afterward, I felt both miserable and relieved. I created a schedule filled with goals linked to higher values that I hoped would bring me fulfillment and contribute to others as well. I brought ice cream to a dying woman in my neighborhood, wrote a book, worked on being a good friend, invested in religious practices, practiced yoga, and went on mindfulness retreats. On one of those retreats, newly single, in Maui, as I sat in front of meditation masters Ram Dass, author of the celebrated Be Here Now, and Sharon Salzberg, who has also written practical books on mindfulness and whose compassion
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