Compassion, I explained, is more about accepting that all human beings are imperfect and will face pain. What I wanted her to try to do, specifically, was to practice the steps of self-compassion that expert and author Kristen Neff delineates. These include self-kindness, which means caring for yourself rather than judging yourself, seeing yourself as a part of a common humanity rather than as a woman alone. I also told Rachel that it was important for her to be mindful, to take notice of thoughts and feelings, rather than dismissing or exaggerating them.
