huge focus of our training was validation, which means communicating your understanding and acceptance of another person’s emotions, thoughts, pain, and desires. Just as invalidating someone’s feelings or words creates distance, it’s pretty remarkable how validation increases closeness and intimacy. Validation isn’t sounding fake, like an insincere therapist uttering, “It sounds like you’re feeling . . .” It’s also the opposite of being defensive or saying something like “I totally get it,” which no one ever does. It’s taking a genuine interest and expressing how someone’s experience makes
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