More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
Remember A quest has a few key features, including a clear goal, a real challenge, and a set of milestones along the way. Pay attention to the ideas that draw your interest, especially the ones you can’t stop thinking about. This book isn’t just a study of what other people have done. You, too, can identify and pursue a quest.
I found the real answer as I dug deeper into the mix of frustration and inspiration that drives action. Most of the people I talked to, in one way or another, had been dissatisfied with their normal lives. They wanted something deeper than they had known or experienced, and they either found it or created it.
Dissatisfaction + Big Idea + Willingness to Take Action = New Adventure
If you’ve ever felt a strange sense of sadness or alienation, there’s a potential way out of the confusion—just shift this feeling to a sense of purpose. It’s not all about happiness, although happiness often results from doing something you love. Instead, it’s about challenge and fulfillment, finding the perfect combination of striving and achievement that comes from reaching a big goal.
Metaphorically, discontent is the match and inspiration is the kindling. When discontent leads to excitement, that’s when you know you’ve found your pursuit.
Remember Many quests begin from a sense of discontent or alienation. If you find yourself feeling discontented, pay attention to the reasons why. Add action to discontent: Find a way to do something about the uncertainty you feel. Asking yourself a series of questions (“What do I want?” “How am I feeling?” and so forth) can help you find your next steps.
Just as general dissatisfaction is often not enough to spur action, being emotionally impacted by a significant event may not be sufficient, either. You have to choose to respond to the event.
Not every calling is religious or explicitly moral. People who are nonreligious, or whose religious practice is more personal, also speak of embracing a calling when they inch closer toward the goals they’ve set. Whether it’s writing, crafting, or saving the world, submitting to a purpose greater than yourself can prove fulfilling. It’s a combination of destiny and determined free will. No matter which you believe—and perhaps in the end it’s a bit of both—those who pursue a calling feel a deep sense of mission. For some, that feeling can lead to lifelong sacrifice and discovery.
Embracing a calling is about being the best at something, or doing something that you feel no one else can do. Not necessarily in a competitive manner, where you have to beat someone else, but according to your own standard of what you know is true. Some of us discover a quest, and sometimes the quest discovers us. Whichever is the case with you, once you identify your calling, don’t lose sight of it.
As much as it sounds trite to “live like you’re dying” or “live every day as if it were your last,” that’s exactly what many people obsessed with a quest do. This shift from an intellectual awareness that we will someday die to an emotional awareness can be a guiding light to discovering what really matters. Intellectual Awareness of Mortality: “I know that no one lives forever.” Emotional Awareness of Mortality: “I know that I will someday die.”
What’s the difference between a hobby and a quest? You can stop thinking about a hobby, but a quest becomes a total fascination. Playing golf on the weekends is a hobby. Setting out to play St. Andrews or lower your score is a goal. Setting out to play every course in Scotland, in a set period of time, is a quest.
There’s an obsession factor with many quests. When you wake up at night consumed by your idea, that’s when you’ve found a quest.
“I might fail, but I’d never forgive myself if I didn’t try.”
“Once you make the leap, be patient … very patient and persistent. Do work your butt off for a couple years if that’s how long it’ll take for you to get there. Easy projects aren’t quests, they’re holidays from real life. Any real trial will challenge you to the core. Acknowledge that and fight like hell to keep working through it!”
“If I didn’t do it, I would always wonder about what could have been,”
You must believe that your quest can be successful, even if no one else does. You can deal with setbacks, misadventures, and even disasters as long as you still believe you can overcome the hardships and see your way to the end. If no one else believes, it may be hard—but you can still do it.
A desire for ownership and accomplishment, the fierce desire for control over one’s life—these are powerful forces. Being told you can’t do something is supremely motivating. There is joy in the retelling of the stories.
WHAT PEOPLE SAY ABOUT AN ADVENTURE OR QUEST THAT INVOLVES PERCEIVED RISK: Successful Outcome: brave, courageous, confident Failed Outcome: stupid, risky, naive, arrogant
Judgments about whether a quest is brave or stupid tend to be relative. While authorities can play a role in setting conditions for a quest that serve to protect the fearless from themselves, ultimately assessments of a quest’s worthiness depend on the result. Sometimes life itself is risky. There are few goals worth pursuing that are totally risk free.
I’d like to repeat the advice that I gave you before, in that I think you really should make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very
...more
Remember You have to believe in your quest even if others don’t. We tend to judge risk based on outcome—but the outcome isn’t always up to us. Life itself is risky. Choose your own risk level.
There are two popular theories of change making: 1. Make small and incremental (but regular) changes. Mix it up. 2. Do it all at once. Quit smoking immediately. Take cold showers. Enter boot camp for the soul—whatever you need to do, don’t wait. Either of these options can work, but there’s no third theory of waiting for change to knock on your door and announce its arrival. You must do something. The sooner, the better.
Remember Ask yourself what it will cost to follow your dream. Get specific. Be sure to clearly understand the time, money, and other costs before you begin. Generate confidence by listing the questions that your project provokes, and also the objections that you’ll want to deal with in advance. Planning is good … but if you spend all your time planning without making progress, try doing something instead.
Remember If your family or close friends don’t understand your dream, you need to find people who do. Must a dream have only one owner? Not if two or more minds see the world from the same perspective. Even with the support of others, it’s hard to struggle through hardship without sufficient motivation of your own.
What’s truly worth dying for? It’s difficult to know for sure—rarely does anyone get a say in how they die and whether it’s for some kind of cause. Most of us die whenever the time comes, whether we’re prepared to make a statement or not. And yet, every single day, each of us gets to answer a far more interesting question: What’s worth living for? If you could only pursue one thing, what would you craft a life around and do every day? And what if real sacrifice was involved … would you stick with it?
If you’re trying to find your own quest, you may find it helpful to ask yourself a few questions. Some people find their quests by focusing on passions and interests—something they love to do or parts of the world they want to explore. If that doesn’t work, though, try a different approach. Instead of asking what excites you, ask what bothers you. There is no shortage of problems in the world, but which one are you most troubled by? What problem are you able to do something about?
Remember Having an enemy or opponent (even an imaginary one) can keep you focused. What’s worth living for? matters more than What’s worth dying for? Understanding what bothers you is just as important as understanding what excites you.
Remember The middle of the quest can be the hardest part. As long as you still believe in the goal, don’t stop! By saving as little as $2/day for just a few years, you can go anywhere in the world. If your quest relies on external recognition, be sure you have sufficient internal motivation as well.
When misadventure strikes, you can panic or you can figure it out. One of these solutions is better than the other.
Remember The right kind of misadventures—the ones that yield information—can produce confidence. If you’re going to worry about something, worry about the cost of not pursuing your dream. Sometimes stopping is the right decision. When considering a shift, ask: Is my heart still in this?
Do all good things come to an end? That’s a debate for another book. But when a good thing reaches its natural end, don’t drag it out. If you don’t like the menu, leave the restaurant.
Remember Pursuing a quest can boost your confidence and establish your independence. Those who pursue quests find themselves focusing more and expanding their vision as they go along. “I’m glad I did it” was the most common statement from people who’d completed a quest.
Don’t forget to debrief. You may need another goal at some point, but be careful to process before jumping back into the grind.
Remember Sometimes quests don’t tie up well. Sometimes it’s hard at the end. If it’s hard to explain the totality of a quest, focus on a few stories. The real world is what you make of it. After completing a quest, the next steps are up to you.
Why pursue a quest? Because each of us in our lives is writing our own story, and we only have one chance to get it right.
