Damnable Grace (Hades Hangmen, #5)

by Tillie Cole

“I’m gonna be a Marine!” I raced into the kitchen. Devin was sitting by the table, working on the engine of his bike. He looked up. His face was pitted with grease. “What?” he exclaimed, brow furrowed.

“I’ve just enlisted.” I smiled, doing a totally shitty job of keeping the excitement from my voice. “Just like you. I’ve joined the Corps.”

He got to his feet and ran his hand down his face. “X, what the fuck have you done?” I shook my head in confusion. “What? What’s wrong?” My brother sighed and looked out the kitchen window. “What’s wrong? What’s wrong?”

“This ain’t the life I wanted for you. You’re my fucking little brother, and you got more brains in that stupid head of yours than I ever had. I was banking on you going to college or some shit. Not the fucking Corps.” “I don’t wanna go to college, Dev. I wanna be over there, fighting, too. I wanna fight beside you.”

“I wanna fight, Dev. I . . .” I laughed, knowing I was about to sound real pathetic. “I wanna fight for our country, like you. I . . . I fucking wanna be like you, Dev. Always have.”

Devin’s eyes shone. Sighing, he grabbed me by the back of my neck and pulled me into his big chest. I struggled to breathe as he hugged me tight.

“When do you report?” Devin’s voice was rough and raw, as if he could barely force the words from his mouth. “In eight weeks.” “Fuck, kid,” he said. “What MOS?” “Scout Sniper...

Devin tensed, then forced himself to relax. It must have been a couple of minutes before he let me go. I was eighteen; Dev was twenty-six. He’d joined the Corps when he was my age, and as soon as he could, he’d gotten us the fuck out of our shithol...

He’d saved us. Pulled us outta the damn gutter. He was my ...

Devin pulled back and kissed ...

I was an inch or two taller than him now and still growing, but I always felt smaller around Dev. He just had that kinda larger-than-...

“I wanted better for you, kid,” he announced. I looked him straight in the eye. “Fighting alongside you, for our country and freedom? That’s as good as it goddamn gets,” I said quietly.

Dev’s face didn’t change. I didn’t see any happiness in it. I just saw disappointment.

“I meant like a doctor or lawyer or some shit, X.” He tapped my head. “Somethi...

“Snipers are the fucking nuts, Dev. The recruitment officer even agreed. Smart, patient, focused. It takes a special kind of someone to be a sniper. Takes skills not everyone has.” ...

“I can be good at this . . . like you. A good Marine.” Dev’s shoulders sagged, and a small wash of pride settled on his expression. “I know you can, kid,” he said thickly. “I ain’t got no worries a...

“We can fight together, and when we’re on leave, we can come home, drink beers, work on our Harleys and just fucking ride until we have to leave again. T...

“Imagine that, Dev. That’s gonna be our life.” I looked him dead in the eye. “Ain’t nothing better to me than family, defending our country and fucking riding...

“What do you want for real, Xavier?” I turned to see Tina, my sister-in-law, watching me and my brother, curiosity written on her face. Before I could answer, Dev slung his arm around my neck and said, “This little fucker’s just signed up to the Corps. Scout Sniper.”

Tina’s eyes widened, and I saw a mixture of pride and worry cloud her blue eyes. “Xavier? Is this true?” “Yes, ma’am.” Her hand flew to her mouth, and she rushed forward and pulled me into a hug. “I’m so proud of you,” she whispered. She stepped back. “So now I have two of you to worry about when you’re away. Great!”

I play-punched Devin on the shoulder. “I’ll look after him, I promise,” I said and laughed when my brother rolled his eyes. Tina laughed...

She and Devin had been together since they were fifteen. Tina always said I was her brother to...

But she was more than a sister. To me, she was the only mother I’d ever really had. She’d raised me, cared for me when I was sick and helped me with school. When Dev was away on a tour...

“Uncle X!” Little feet pattered down the hallway, and my four-year-old nephew came ba...

“Go get your hog, kid. We’ll go for a ride, then barbeque, then we’ll make you the best sniper to ever fight for the red, white and blue.” So that’s what we did. And it was the best fucking day of my life.

Ash stood at the stove, already dressed in jeans and his Hangmen shirt. A fucking mini-Flame in my home. Tattoos, piercings, and those black-as-hell eyes.

He looked up as I entered the kitchen. The little fucker had the audacity to smirk at me. I gave him the finger and slumped down at the table. Two glasses landed in front of me: a glass of orange juice and a shot of tequila.

I groaned as I knocked back the Patrón, then downed the OJ until the glass was done. “Thanks, kid,” I said, then...

“How the hell are you not this hungover, you little fuck? Last I remember, you and Slash were doing shots of Jameson with Vike.” He shrugged. “I was. Just...

I ran a hand over my eyes. The smell of food hit my nostrils, and I dropped my hand to see a full breakfast before me. My stomach growled in appreciation. Ash was still smirking at me, so I nodded and said, “Fine. You’re forgiven.” “For what? Be...

“I . . . I told you I was interested in the Marines. Scout Sniper MOS, like you.” I didn’t expect his words. So I didn’t expect the fucking iron bar that slammed into my stomach when he spoke them. I froze, staring at Ash, his head down, hands wringing together on the tabletop in nerves.

“You wanna join the Corps?” My throat was clogged, and it was a damn battle to get my sentence out. “You’re only sixteen.”

“I . . . I know, but you’ve been teaching me to shoot for months now, and you said it yourself: I’m good.” “You are good, fucking amazing, in fact, but you’re still in school.” Ash nodded, but I could see he was upset at my reaction....

I sighed, working to keep my shit together. This conversation was too familiar. My blood turned to ice in my veins, and I felt as if two mass...

“Ash,” I said quietly, watching his face fall. “Look at me.” He did what I said. In all the months he’d lived with me, the kid had never done a thing wrong. Always did as I said. In that respect he’d make a fucking awesome Marine—obedient, disciplined. But I...

“You okay?” Ash said. I shifted in my seat. “You’re smart, kid. Clever. But you’re still young. I know you don’t think so, or at least don’t feel it. Fuck, after what you’ve been through, I get it. You ain’t a normal teenager. Ain’t obsessed with chasing pussy and whatever the fuck other sixteen-year-ol...

“And I’m sure as shit that Flame ain’t gonna let you join up either.” Ash’s head whipped around to me, and a surprised look formed on his face. “Our brother wouldn’t handle you leaving, so how a...

“Flame?” Ash said in confusion. “I . . .” His shoulders sagged. “I ain’t all that sure he’d mind.” And there it was. The reason Ash was l...

“I get he don’t speak much to you. I get that he spends most of his time with Madds. But I’m telling you now, that psycho fucker loves you more...

“You think?” I put my hand on his shoulder. “You’re one of the only people he allows near him. There’s Madds, of course, because she’s his bitch and got through to him when no other fucker could. There’s me and Vike. That history goes way back—we’ve seen and been through a lot of shit together.”

“Then there’s you.” Ash sucked in a sharp breath and exhaled slowly. “He’s a Hangman through and through, would do anything for his brothers, but he’s never let the rest of them in like he has us.” I gestured out the window, to our small cluster of cabins deep in the Hangmen compound’s land. “This, right here, is what keeps him from breaking apart. And believe it or not, you’re a huge part of that now too.”

“Right now, kid, you’re the fourth member of our fucked-up little trio.” I smiled. “And I ain’t gonna cope with nuclear Flame when we tell him I signed off on your enlistment. I’m kind of a fan of my cock, and I’d prefer to keep it far away from your brother’s serrated knife and more in tight, wet pussies.”

“I thought you liked working on bikes anyway? You spend hours working with Flame on his Harley or in the shop with Tank. Tank says you’re the shit, could be the best damn mechanic we got. You’re in the Hangmen, brother; you’re set for life.” “I like bikes,” he said after a few silent moments. “I really like them, actually. They make sense to me.”

“Then stick with them, yeah? And once you’re a fully patched-in member of the club, you’ll get a cut of the Hangmen profits too. You’ll be fucking golden, kid.”

“Now, get back to those dishes,” I said. “Until you’re patched in, you gotta do the grunt work.” I shrugged. “Just the way it is.” “Yes, sir,” the shitbag said, knowing I hated his young ass making me feel old. Fucking sir.

“I’m starting to think I should get me a fucking live-in rent boy too. He cooks, cleans . . . fuck!” He turned to Ash, who was trying his best to ignore our asshole of a brother. “You suck cock too?” I opened my mouth to tell him to shut the hell up, but Ash said, “Even if I did, I wouldn’t be sucking yours. Heard it’s no bigger than an inch.”

“Viking, AK.” Flame instinctively moved toward her, like they were fucking magnets or some shit. “Madds,” I said. Vike smiled. “Mornin’, sugar tits.” Flame’s lip curled at our brash brother, but it was Vike. Weren’t no one stopping that car crash.

Because it was true. I had failed her. Everything had been for nothing. My life had been for nothing. Nothing . . . . . . all I had left in the world.

Tanner looked at Hush. Hush stared back, one cocky eyebrow raised. “What? No white-trash redneck pseudonym for me, mon frère?”

Tanner’s jaw clenched. “You walk in there and these fuckers will lynch you on the spot.” “Fun,” Hush said dryly. “You stay close, at a nearby motel.” I nodded at my mixed-race brother. “We’ll need a distraction at some point. You’ll be it.”