Kindle Notes & Highlights
Khushwant Singh, in his long and distinguished career, ‘has tried his hand at almost anything that came his way. He has, in turn, been a lawyer, a diplomat, a broadcaster (he has a very good-voice) a United Nations official, an academic, a historian, an editor, a syndicated columnist, an author and a publishing consultant. In between, he has often been jobless.
We Indians are singularly humourless people who find it difficult to laugh unless it is prescribed by a doctor and administered as a dose good for our health. Go to any park in any city and you will see middle-aged men and women with long, sad faces looking as if they had just broken away from a funeral procession for a few minutes to rest their feet before rejoining it.
Much the most laughter-producing Indian jokes are ethnic: about Sardarjis, Marwaris, Mianbhais (urban Muslims), Bongs (Bengalis), Gujjoos (Gujaratis), Mulloos (Malayalees), Tam Brams (Tamil Brahmins), Bawajis (Parsis).
People of an ethnic group enjoy jokes about themselves but resent others enjoying them.
good cartoonists like R.K. Laxman, Vijayan, Rajinder Puri, Mario Miranda, we
Newly-married Banto observed that Santa, her husband, was looking depressed and sullen for quite some time. Being a concerned and dutiful Indian wife, one day she asked, ‘Dear, I know for sure there’s something that is troubling you mentally but let me tell you, your tensions are not just yours alone any more, they are “ours”.’ ‘Oh, I’m so much relieved. It’s so nice of you to think like that,’ Santa opened up. ‘Actually, we have just received a letter from my ex-girlfriend in Jalandhar and she says she’s pregnant with our child!’
There are two communities which have the self-confidence to laugh at themselves: Sikhs and Parsis. Of late, Sardarjis have been getting a little touchy, but not the Parsis. A Bawaji (Parsi), has sent me a few samples of Parsi humour: Q:‘What does one call a dead-drunk Parsi?’ A:‘Bejan Daruwala.’ Q:‘What describes a Parsi pimp?’ A:‘Naari Contractor.’ Q:‘What is a Parsi test-tube baby known as?’ A:‘Batliboi.’
There are three stages in a married woman’s life. First, she is Chandra Mukhi, then Surya Mukhi and lastly Jwala Mukhi.
Santa was only 50 years old when he was diagnosed with terminal cancer. When friends came to solace him he told them he was suffering from AIDS. His son protested: ‘You have cancer, why are you telling everyone you have AIDS?’ ‘Putter, your mother is still young. If I died of cancer, my friends will come visiting my home to see her. If they think I died of AIDS, they will keep their distance.’
Je juande rahe, taan baar-baar milaange, Nahin taan mitraa, Haridwar milaange.
If computer windows were in Punjabi then: Send: Sutto Insert: Wich pao Download: Thale lao Trash: Mitti pao Ctrl+Alt+Del: Syapa Mukao!!!
The businessman who had his store at one end of the building put up a sign reading, ‘Year-End Clearance Sale’. At the far end of the building, the other businessman put up a sign that read, ‘Closing Out Sale’. The businessman who ran the store in the middle of the building got nervous. He was afraid that his business would certainly be hurt due to the two prominent signs put up by his competitors. Hence he put up a big sign that read: ‘Main Entrance’.
