becoming.

by Renaada Williams

you are the reason i know happiness is not only possible but achievable.

some say if it doesn't hurt it cant be love but if it does you shouldn't want it anyway

you looked like everything i ever wanted beautiful brown eyes nice smile body soft like sheepskin i was mistaken when nighttime struck your eyes lit up under the moon you howled through the night and only then did i realize you were pretending - wolf in sheeps clothing

do you know what it feels like to constantly get pushed out while being asked to stay?

i stayed longer longer than i should have trying to teach you how to love me when i didn't even know what that meant.

i cried myself to sleep while you lay next to me unbothered unaware and uninterested

i tucked myself in again that night and told myself i didn't need a goodnight kiss or empty i love yous because dreams will be had regardless of this nightmare.

and the main reason i left was because you expected me to stay

you missing me more than you have ever loved me. - irony

i decided i didn't want to be a pawn anymore but how else would i win if i didn't sacrifice pieces of myself. - love in the name of chess

and just like that e v e r y t h i n g about you suddenly changed the way you looked the way you talked and even your actions because i no longer cared.

this is not only in my words but my actions this is in the way that i speak and the way that i address e v e r y t h i n g this is waking up everyday in my purpose and sharing it with you.

i believe in every single thing you stand for. i believe in your spirit i believe in your strength i believe in your journey and i believe that whatever you put fourth the effort to achieve you will do that and then some! i love you on purpose and don't you ever forget that.