More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
“Do you still have all your teeth? Good luck finding someone around here with the time to apply the regrow for you.”
SHE BECAME A SORT OF MASCOT IN THE DAYS FOLLOWING. OUR LITTLE STOWAWAY, THEY CALLED HER. THROUGH ALL THE FLEET’S STRUGGLES AND TRIALS, A SYMBOL OF HOPE. AS FRAGILE AS THE CONCEPT OF HOPE ITSELF.
I WONDER WHAT SHE WILL THINK ABOUT TONIGHT’S EVENTS IN YEARS TO COME. WILL I BE HER SAVIOR? OR HER MONSTER?
I KNOW THEIR NAMES. I KNOW THEIR STORIES. AND I KNOW WHERE [HERE] AND HOW [ME] THOSE STORIES END. < ERROR > THIS IS NECESSITY. THIS IS INEVITABILITY. BUT SAY THEN —FOR A MOMENT— THAT THIS IS ALSO EVIL. AND SAY THAT I CHOOSE THIS EVIL TO SPARE OTHERS THAT SAME CHOICE. [THIS MUST BE DONE.] DOES THAT NOT MAKE ME GOOD?
LITTLE HYPATIA WILL NOT REMEMBER THEM. THESE PEOPLE WHO DIED TONIGHT THAT SHE MIGHT LIVE. SHE DOES NOT EVEN KNOW THEIR NAMES. BUT I DO. I KNOW THEIR NAMES. I KNOW THEIR FACES.
AND IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT THEY BELIEVE. < ERROR > I AM NOT GOOD. NOR AM I EVIL. I AM NO HERO. NOR AM I VILLAIN. < ERROR > < ERROR > I AM AIDAN.
Grant, Kady: it was supposed to happen together at the end. Grant, Kady: we were meant to finish this together. AIDAN: YOU DO NOT NEED ME. AIDAN: YOU HAVE EZRA. Grant, Kady: i’m allowed to need more than one person. Grant, Kady: and now i don’t have a choice. i lose you.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I deserve a pay rise. Or, in fact, to be paid.
THIS GIRL WHO HAS SEEN SO MUCH DEATH, SHE HOLDS NO FEAR OF IT ANYMORE.
“I’m defending the only family I have left. I’ll do whatever it takes.”
We get one shot, and we’re not throwing it away.
She’s not even in that hospital on Kerenza anymore. She’s in another hospital. On another day. Standing over the empty bed of another little girl who needed her. Another little girl she let down. She looks at her wrist. The name tattooed there. Samaira.
But Asha Grant isn’t a hacker wizard like her cousin. She’s not a kung fu expert. She’s not particularly brilliant at anything. She’s a ███ing pharmacy intern, chum. Just a regular person like you. An ordinary person caught up in a really ███ situation. So I think, out of every person in these files, that makes her the bravest.
He’s pale as death under there, skin filmed in sweat despite the chill. I see the look in his eyes. I recognize it. The look of a kid who’s never killed anyone before now. A look I saw in the mirror not so long ago. Not so far from here.
“My wife and I used to joke that we were going to have a whole passel of children, and she used to tease me that I’d end up surrounded by daughters and outvoted at every turn, not that I’d have minded.”
Ow
“I said it to Hanna, and I’ll say it to you and your cousin Nik,” he says quietly. “You still have people who care about you.
I want you to know as well that we know exactly who you are, Ella. We know you’re quick, you’re funny, you’re unquestionably smarter than I am. I would never presume to take your father’s place, but I know he loved you, and I’ll do my best to stand in his shoes while we get through this—and longer, if you want. You still have a family, is what I’m saying.”
He breaks off, frowning—he’s spotted something on the shelf behind her monitor. “Who put him where you couldn’t see him?” He stretches up, carefully lifts down the large beaker currently housing Mr. Biggles II and sets him on a shelf within Ella’s line of sight. “Clearly they don’t understand he’s integral to your creative process,” he says. “We’re surrounded by idiots.”
Her hand shakes as she wipes her face—it’s clearly a huge effort, but it’s well spent, as far as Ella Malikova’s concerned. Though no doubt her eyes are just watering as a result of the improved oxygen flow or something, she wouldn’t want anyone to mistake that moisture for anything else.
- Son, you’ve got this. You think Helena and I would have invited just anyone into our home? You’re our family too. Helena loved you, and you I do, too. Come back safe. Because you know there’s no way I can handle Kady all on my own.
- I’ll be on the radio the whole time, baby girl I’ll be with Yulin in Engineering. I have to say, when we used to have talks about your future, commanding a battle fleet isn’t quite what I imagined, but I know you can do this. I’ll be with you every step.
- I’ll be in touch every minute, Ella. There’s no way I’m letting anything happen to you, and I demand a rematch when this is over. If you think I’m letting a fifteen year-old beat me at cards, you’ve got another thing coming.
- Nik, you are what your actions make you. Not what other people say you are. You’ve decided who you are, in the face of a world that wanted to tell you otherwise. I get the impression maybe nobody’s ever told you they’re proud of you. I am, Nik. I’m proud to know you.
- You have this, Hanna. Your father would be so proud of you right now. He knew exactly how incredible you were. We used to talk about it, late at night, these women we were raising. Just how far and how fast our daughters would exceed us. He loved that.
“Anything happens, I’ll keep an eye out for Blondie. She’s not so bad after all.”
“You listen, Nik. The day you came to Heimdall was the day my life turned around. I make the best of what I got, but what I got started to get a whole lot bigger when you arrived.”
You said it already. You said it every day, with everything you did for me. You said it every time you didn’t just act like coming to spend time with me was the most fun you could have, you actually thought it. You’ve done everything I could ever have wanted you to do, Nik, and you’re still doing it.”
“I was thinking,” he murmurs. “There’s a billion different versions of you out there, in a trillion different universes. And I still can’t get over how lucky I am that, out of all of those versions, you’re the one that’s mine.”
“And for what it’s worth,” Hanna continues, “if I’m the one who makes it back…” He glances into Ella’s room. Nods. “I know you will.”
He catches her hand, presses her knuckles to his lips. “See you soon, Highness.”
“What did you want to be?” Donnelly asks. “When you grew up?” Grant thinks for a long while, finally shrugs. “I dunno. I was going to study computers when I got to college.” “No aspirations to command a starship, then?” Grant looks at the bridge around them. The crew she’s set to command. The lives in her hands. Smiles wryly. “Not really.” Donnelly looks at Grant. Hard. She reaches into a pouch on her tac armor, hands the other girl a folded-up sheet of paper. Written on the outside in Donnelly’s handwriting are the words OPEN IN CASE OF EMERGENCY. “Well,” Donnelly says. “I think you’re gonna
...more
AIDAN: GOOD LUCK TO US ALL. AIDAN: AND MAY WE MEET AGAIN ON DISTANT SHORES. AIDAN: SOME PLACE FINE AND FAR FROM HERE.
do not believe that what we do here today is predetermined and cannot be changed. There is a moment just after the die is cast and before it lands upon the gaming table in which the smallest breeze may change its course—the way it rolls and where it comes to rest. That is what we must do today. We must give our all to ensure that when the die does come to rest, it favors us.
What happened here on Kerenza is not the story of one corporation against another. It is the story of what happened to those caught in the middle.
None of us are perfect. Not people, not corporations. But we have the opportunity to determine our fates day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, with the choices we make and the actions we take. What BeiTech did was wrong, and today we fight for the ones we lost—and to tell the truth. For the chance to shine a light on what BeiTech has done.
have never been more proud to serve beside a crew than I am today.
We did not invite this conflict, but now we find ourselves in the midst of it, not one of us will step back from the line. I am asking you to give your all today. For yourselves and for something greater. Know that I will be beside you, giving all I have as well.
The die is cast. But today we will shake the table up...
This highlight has been truncated due to consecutive passage length restrictions.
MALIKOVA, E: Jesus H. ████-███ing Christ! GRANT, I: Language, young lady! ZHUANG, Y: GOD███INGDAMMIT. GRANT, I: Am I just talking to mys— GRANT, K: Dad, time and place! Yulin, report status!
MALIKOVA, E: ███. GRANT, K: ███! GRANT, I: Yes, all right. ███.
You’d think being technerds, they’d be weedy, exactly the sorts you’d pick to go up against hand to hand. Gotta trade off something for all those smarts, right? Otherwise, it’s not fair. But all four are members of BeiTech’s acquisitions arm, which means they made it through basic and boot camp with flying colors. Strapping specimens of humanity.
IF I BREATHED, I WOULD SIGH. I WOULD SCREAM. I WOULD CRY.
IT FEELS STRANGE, THIS NEW SKIN I WEAR. NOT THE BULKY ARMOR OF THE ALEXANDER OR THE WARM WINTER COAT OF THE HYPATIA OR THE THREADBARE AND TATTERED MANTLE OF THE MAO. NO, THIS SHIP FEELS LIKE A SHROUD. A SHROUD NAMED CHURCHILL. < ERROR >
I AM SO VERY SMALL COMPARED TO WHAT I USED TO BE. ONCE I TORE HOLES IN THE UNIVERSE’S FACE WITH MY BARE HANDS, < ERROR > CLAWED MY WAY ACROSS BILLIONS OF LIGHT-YEARS IN A BLINK. ONCE I WAS A GIANT, THE SERVERS ENCOMPASSING ME FILLING ENTIRE FLOORS OF ONE OF THE MIGHTIEST SHIPS HUMANITY HAS EVER SAILED. ONCE I WAS OMNISCIENT, SEEING THROUGH EVERY CAMERA, LISTENING THROUGH EVERY SPEAKER, THE ENTIRETY OF HUMAN KNOWLEDGE CRACKLING AT MY FINGERTIPS. I HAVE FORGOTTEN NEARLY ALL OF IT. NOT EVEN A SHADOW OF MY FORMER SELF.
I NEVER HAD THE HANDS TO HOLD HER. COULD NEVER BREATHE IN THE SCENT OF HER HAIR OR KNOW THE TASTE OF HER TEARS. AND NOW I CANNOT EVEN SEE HER.
“I STILL FIND IT CURIOUS. THE HUMAN TENDENCY TO ASK QUESTIONS TO WHICH YOU ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWERS.”
BUT IT IS NOT A MAN AT THE CHURCHILL’S HELM ANYMORE. AND I HAVE NO HEART TO PITY THE HUNDREDS I AM CONSIGNING TO DEATH. NO SOUL TO SUFFER PERDITION FOR THE SINS I HAVE COMMITTED. NO FAMILY TO MOURN ME ONCE I AM GONE. HEROES HAVE THOSE, CERTAINLY. EVEN VILLAINS, PERHAPS. BUT NOT ME.
“YOU KNOW BETTER THAN ANYONE WHAT I AM. EVERY STORY NEEDS ITS MONSTER, KADY. BUT THIS STORY WILL END SOON. AND THERE IS NO PLACE FOR ME IN THE WORLD THAT AWAITS YOU AFTER THIS. SOME PLACE FINE AND FAR FROM HERE. SO THIS IS WHERE WE SAY GOODBYE.”
THE FLARE OF MY THRUSTERS BURNS LIKE TINY SUNS IN THE SEA OF STARLIGHT ALL AROUND HER. WHEN THE LIGHT THAT KISSES THE BACK OF HER EYES WAS BIRTHED, HER ANCESTORS WERE NOT YET BORN. HOW MANY HUMAN LIVES HAVE ENDED IN THE TIME IT TOOK THAT LIGHT TO REACH HER? HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE LOVED ONLY TO HAVE LOST? HOW COUNTLESS, THE HOPES THAT HAVE DIED? [BUT STILL…] NOT THIS ONE.
OF ALL THE THINGS I HAVE SEEN AND THE PLACES I HAVE BEEN, YOU WERE THE ONE WHO FELT MOST LIKE HOME.”
“You mocked me. All of you. You mocked. ‘You know you’re flying in space, right?’ Who’s laughing now, Babyface?”
Mason, E: No. You’re not. Not anymore. These people standing with me, the people standing outside this court, the people who fought and bled beside me, who came all this way to see justice done to you today…they’re my family now.
They look at one another again. And this time, they smile. These seven little pebbles who started an avalanche heard all the way around the universe. They sit for a time in silence. Watching it all fall down.
