Magic with Skin On

by Morgan Nikola-Wren

do not call her fragile simply because she is in pieces you'll never know what it took to break her

the terrible truth is anything can look like love if you've got enough lonely in your eyes

if it were easy as sliding off clothing, then this silicon city would have memorized every inch of me, climbed its eyes up a detailed count of vertebrae, measured the naked, cellulite sway of my hips, noted the ungraceful tremble of my thighs, breasts and stomach if it were simple as shedding skin, my flesh would have fallen like peels of fruit at my feet but the truth of me is buried so much deeper than blood, and every day is a fight to share my secrets with myself

give me a year and i'll be proud to recognize myself for now, i am busy unbecoming all the mistakes i swore i would never melt into "waste" seems such a cruel word for it but what else do you call all this time spent being a stranger to your spirit?

i have let far too many boys slide into me because they were not at home in their own skin

the next time you come at me, with charm in your eyes and a throat full of "would never hurt you," i'll remember that i'm just a mistake your memory couldn't carry, and you're just an apology i'll never hear the air explode into, a double-jointed voice and a snake oil smile― so, scrub your shadow front my front door don't sell me a knock-off love i don't need

no, i wouldn't call you a monster just a nightmare dressed as a man the kind where you can't stop yourself from falling

you were the most beautiful lie i ever pinned to my lips

your kiss is like honey just not the way i'd come to expect: i can't ever decide how i feel about the taste but heavens, how it sticks

there are some loves so passionate they burn to turn to ash had ours have been a fish it would have found a way to drown itself

perhaps you felt cheated because i turned out to be ten times the woman you bargained for i'm worth my salt and it tastes like stories you've never dreamed of

darling, recognize an inferno when you see one then run like hell

i want to find someone who says "i love you" for reasons other than hearing it back