A gay man can easily confuse joy with the satisfaction of validation. He may mistake the warm feeling of having other men notice him, perhaps when he works out at the gym or when he enters the room at a party, as joy. Or he may assume that the feeling after the applause of the audience following his performance or the rave review of a critic is joy. While there may be some joy felt in both these situations, there is a difference in experiencing authentic joy and the temporary satisfaction that comes from validation. Joy emerges from inside you and is intrinsically generated. Validation is most
  
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