The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity

by Esther Perel

Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like none other, into the crevices of the human heart.

A Truth that’s told with bad intent Beats all the Lies you can invent.

Sometimes silence is caring. Before you unload your guilt onto an unsuspecting partner, consider, whose well-being are you really thinking of? Is your soul-cleansing as selfless as it appears? And what is your partner supposed to do with this information?

Reinforcing this segregation of the affair from reality is the fact that many, like Priya, choose lovers who either could not or would not become a life partner. By falling for someone from a very different class, culture, or generation, we play with possibilities that we would not entertain as actualities.