Here’s a delusional and misguided hypothesis: If I could just fall in love with a man, it would put an end to the anguish of having fallen in love with a woman by somehow overwriting that earlier consciousness. Falling in love with a man and falling in love with a woman are two completely different things. My attraction to women has materialized, and regardless of whether it becomes a thing of the past, it’s a part of me. By the same token, the part of me battling that attraction has been around even longer. It’s like taking a bucket of black dye and adding other colors to it, hoping to change
...more
