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She travelled up and down the
corridor nonetheless, gathering her thoughts in tiny steps.
The guilt gnawed at her insides and made it impossible for Nikki to grieve. At the funeral, she willed for tears to arrive and provide some release but they never did.
Perhaps passion and excitement were meant to be secondary to a stable adult life.
Through the windows of the connecting bus to the temple, the sight of more bilingual signs on shop fronts gave Nikki a slight headache and the sensation of being split in two parts. British, Indian.
‘Some people don’t even know about this place,’ she would say.
Kulwinder felt the smallness of being in this new country, learning the alphabet like children.
‘Soon Maya will be translating everything for us,’ Sarab had remarked. Kulwinder wished he hadn’t said this. Children shouldn’t know more than their parents.
and as the only woman on the board, I should be representing them.’
she wondered why men needed all that space when their answers to everything were always ‘no’.
‘You follow your so-called passions and don’t consider the consequences for other people.’
Try it again and you will be in a lot of trouble.’ Kulwinder tried to defend herself but, as always, her caller hung up before she had a chance to speak.
‘Why be with someone who’s making the journey? You could be with someone who has already arrived.’
Willingness to begin the journey is just as admirable as arriving to the end of it. Also, everyone is constantly learning and we all start from different places. Nikki has an issue with thinking herself above other people and her view points better than the conservative ones of her family and the widows. She can’t expect her sister’s boyfriend to be at her level of understanding when her sister isn’t even there yet. In fact, Mindi seems more opened minded toward other people’s worldviews than Nikki does.
Nikki, you go on about how narrow-minded everyone else is yet you think there’s only one way to live and fall in love. Anybody who isn’t like you is doing it wrong.’