And if I’m honest, I’m still sometimes afraid of silence. In silence, I’m unable to control my environment. In silence, I’m forced to face myself, allowing all my fears, shame, guilt, regrets, disappointments, doubts, and resentments to come to the surface. In silence, my ambition and drive slow down just enough for my mind to come up with new thoughts, unwanted (though sometimes important) to-do lists, and more ideas than I know what to do with. Sometimes silence is downright exhausting. It’s an assault on my mind and emotions, not the imagined blissful experience I wish it would be. In other
...more
