I entered Kit’s room and securely closed the door behind me. I dropped my backpack on the bed, rolled up my sleeves, and got busy de-gaying the space. As if equipped with a Terminator-like motion analysis detector, I scanned the room looking for vulnerabilities. I noticed among Kit’s little village of curiosities the statue of a small green man, smiling, with a disproportionately large, erect penis. I grabbed it. I combed over his bookshelf and spotted two VHS gay porn tapes sandwiched between the Sex and the City and AbFab box sets. I then raced into the bathroom and snatched the Peter Meter
...more
