How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 (The How To Talk Series)

by Joanna Faber

This week I’ve started telling him my feelings instead. “When I see one child hurting another child I get very upset!” I have to admit it works! He stops and he doesn’t laugh or run away. Last night at bedtime he told me his feelings. He was jumping on the bed saying, “I’m . . . angry . . . at . . . you!” with one word for each jump. I could guess why. Isabel had a fever and was on my lap all day. I told Benjamin, “It’s annoying to have a sick sister! She gets all Mama’s attention.” He jumped until he collapsed on the bed with me admiring each jump. “Oh my gosh, you almost touched the ceiling. You almost flew like a bird. You almost went to outer space!” I told him, “You’re getting good at putting your angry feelings into words instead of hitting. That’s not easy to do.” He crawled into my lap and gave me a hug! I feel like this kind of language is helping us get back to the close connection we had before Isabel was born, when he became the rough older brother and I became the angry mother.

What a great example!