“When I see you hurting your sister . . .” When expressing annoyance, irritation, or anger, it’s important to banish the word you. The you is accusatory. As soon as a child hears you, he feels defensive. He may respond by arguing, laughing inappropriately, running away, or getting angry in return. If we can avoid you altogether, we’re much more likely to get a cooperative attitude. There’s a world of difference between, “Look at this mess you made!” and “I don’t like to see food on the floor!” To the first statement, a child is likely to respond, “I didn’t do it!” “Why are you yelling at me?
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Avoid "you" statements
