Instead of accusing and interrogating, state the obvious. In the case of the purloined dessert, you can simply say, “I see you ate the cake.” If she protests, don’t call her a liar. Instead, you can accept the feeling behind the protest. “It’s not easy to resist eating chocolate cake when it’s sitting right in front of you. I bet you wish you hadn’t eaten it!” Let her know how you feel: “I’m very upset that the cake was eaten! I was going to serve it for dessert when our friends come for dinner tonight!” Make a plan for the future: “Next time you’re tempted, let me know. I’m sure we can find a
...more
