Beard Mode (The Dixie Warden Rejects MC #1)

by Lani Lynn Vale

Scooters are for men who prefer to feel wind on their vagina. -Bumper Sticker

I’m just going to put an ‘out of order’ sticker on my forehead and call it a day. -E-card

“Everyone has moments when they’re an asshole, even if they don’t mean to be one. You just have to suck it up, apologize and move on. What’s done is done. Look forward to the future, and don’t dwell on the past.”

Did you hear that? That was the sound of my ovaries exploding. -Imogen upon seeing Aaron with a baby in his arms

Milk is good for your teeth. So is minding your own goddamned business. -Note to self

This life would kill me if I didn’t have you. And chocolate. I have to have chocolate, too. Chocolate makes me happy. -Imogen’s secret thoughts

I would kill for some chocolate right now.

We don’t lick people. -Lies adults tell kids

Do your boobs hang low? Can they touch your camel toe? -T-shirt

OMG. I'm dying of laughter now. 😆

Is there a mood for wanting to punch someone in the throat? -Imogen to Aaron