101 Essays That Will Change The Way You Think

by Brianna Wiest

Self-assertiveness.

Living purposefully.

Personal integrity.

Branden, Nathaniel. The Psychology of Self-Esteem. 2001. Jossey-Bass.

Why You Should Thank The People who have Hurt You Most In Life

Restructure your digital life. It’s not realistic (or desirable to a lot of people) to be forever disconnected, but it’s also not realistic to keep things that don’t serve you positively in your social feeds and expect it not to affect you. Instead of just unfollowing what you don’t want to see, follow positive accounts/groups/organizations/publications that you do.

you want your life to be different, do differently.

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

figure out what you most need to heal within yourself by seeing what you most want to change in others.

There is a purpose to all things.

You have yet to honor the child inside you. If you want to know who you really are, imagine speaking to yourself as a child. What would you say and do to make them feel happy? That expression is reflective of what you really need to give yourself and is very, very helpful for people who are seeking love. Because learning to love yourself is, as odd as it may sound, learning to honor, respect, love and acknowledge the child in you, or in other words, your most essential self.

So where you feel you are lacking, you must give. Where there is tension, you must unpack. If you want more recognition, recognize others. If you want love, be more loving. Give exactly what you want to get. If you want to let go of something, build something new. If you don’t understand, ask. If you don’t like something, say so. If you want to change, start small. If you want something, ask for it. If you love someone, tell them. If you want to attract something, become it. If you enjoy something, let yourself feel it.

Loving yourself is letting yourself be loved, too.

You are not loved by everybody, but that does not mean you are not loved at all. You are not the most beautiful, but being the most beautiful is not what matters most. You are bound by nothing but your own fear, so you will not find freedom anywhere but within yourself.

Pain is a signal that something’s wrong, suffering is what happens when we don’t heed it.

Justifying your choices to people who only care about how you look within the context of their lives.

Remaining in contact with people you don’t like because you “should,” because it’s more convenient, because you’ll feel guilty if you don’t, because you’re too afraid of what someone will think if you’re finally honest with yourself and other people.

Eating food you don’t like, keeping plans you don’t want, staying digitally connected with people who annoy you, hoarding clothes for a “someday” that never comes and putting your life on hold for someone who does not—and will never—want to commit.

Putting the things you want most off until it’s more “convenient.”

If you’re looking for a reason not to, you’ll always find a reason not to. If you’re looking for a way how, you’ll always find a way how.

Staying at a job where you’re miserable.

Waiting for something outside to fix your inside.

Success is falling in love with the process, not the outcome.

You don’t “have” to, you “get” to.

You probably can’t be whatever you want, but if you’re really lucky and you work really hard, you can be exactly who you are.

Simplicity.

Unless you are there to touch and smell and see a flower, it is nothing but random matter vibrating in a void. Your recognition gives it its beauty and its presence.

The reality of it is you will never know the entirety of what people are saying or thinking or believing, and those things are none of your business.

Bad feelings become bad when we fight them.

interaction has less to do with how other people treat you and more to do with how you perceive yourself based on that treatment.

Kids do not do what we tell them; they do what we do. If we want the world to change, we have to change ourselves. If we want to inspire them to cope with their feelings, we must learn to cope with our own.

Our pain serves us. It is a crucial, guiding force. Suffering begins to thrive when we don’t listen to it.

When you’ve shifted your baseline from “survive” to “thrive” and have detached from outcomes, you can enjoy what each day brings.

You have to be kind to yourself.

why do I value the thoughts and opinions of other people more than I do my own?

it’s about knowing that you accomplished something (anything!) that contributes to your well-being each day.

The only thing you should ever try to do when you’re very anxious or panicked is to comfort yourself. You cannot think clearly and shouldn’t make assumptions or decisions about your life in that state. Figure out what soothes you (a snack, a bath, talking to someone, doing something you really enjoy) and get yourself out that energy before you do anything else.

You can change how you feel.