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“No, you can’t stay every night.” Vhalla shook her head, but didn’t shrug off the soothing palm stroking her tangled mess of brown hair. “Who says?” The woman assumed her position between Vhalla and the wall. It was cramped with the two of them, but Vhalla was too exhausted to object. They lay facing each other, hands held tightly.
Lightning was fire in the sky, lightning was brilliant, lightning was fast, and lightning cut the heavens.
“I think,” she started softly, “that I like playing with fire.”
A prince with a golden circlet was painted across her memories.
“Why? Why do I make my own armor, my parrot?”
“The major told me you are capable of magical sight?” Vhalla nodded,
She squeezed his hand and was surprised when she felt a squeeze back.
“Every night, I see them. I hear their screams and I feel their blood on my hands, on my face.” She shuddered as her voice broke and pulled her hand away from his to wrap her arms around herself. “At first I didn’t know what they were, but that night, in the forest, I remembered.”
“I—” Vhalla stumbled over her words. “I am . . . happier . . . with you, near you.” Something about him softened, but there was a sadness to it that made Vhalla feel guilty for her confession.
Like life and death all bundled neatly into one moment of beauty. She tried to find where her own self ended, to find where he began, but there were no ends or beginnings anywhere. They were infinite. She felt as he felt, and he thought as she thought.
she saw a moment of panic, a moment of want—and he withdrew mentally. Vhalla realized he may be unable to hide anything from her again in the darkness of his eyes,
Vhalla wasn’t sure what she had done wrong, but he had completely shut himself off from her. He was the one who had suggested the Joining; what was he suddenly so afraid of? She sighed and pulled herself to her feet.
Vhalla nodded and searched his guarded gaze for a long moment. She saw it there still, his turmoil. But turmoil over what? That was a question she had yet to answer.
She watched the prince as he fell into line beside Elecia. Vhalla tore her eyes away before she saw more than a moment of their immediate and engaging conversation.
Before she left, he invited her out to ride with him again
She had this annoying manner that made her seem like she was better than everyone else. She took Aldrik’s time and attention.
“What about you, Vhalla Yarl? How exactly did you, less than a slip of a common girl, catch the eye of the crown prince? A nothing like you fraternizing with him!”
But once some things were said they could never be unheard, and the brief exchange was already repeating in her ears.
Aldrik paused before moving his hands to cup her face. He ran his thumbs over her tearstained cheeks, and she relished his eyes on her for the first time in what felt like forever. “I’m fine,” he whispered. “See, I am fine.”
“I was afraid I’d lost you.” The words were an arrow into the heart of the silence that had been flourishing between them.
“I told you, you foolish woman,” he whispered, his breath washing away the scalding embarrassment. “You have to tell me if you want to lose me.”
Aldrik’s hand shifted, and she felt his fingers lose themselves in her tangled morning hair.
“I would do it because it would please you.”
“I realized something this morning, these past days,” Aldrik murmured. “I am a spoiled prince. No matter how unfair it may be, I do not do well being denied something I want, even if it’s self-inflicted. I have hurt you, I have put you in harm’s way, and I will continue to ask so much more of you the longer you stay near me. Yet knowing this, I seem to want you closer even when sense tells me the opposite.”
“Aldrik?” she inquired with another yawn. “Vhalla?” She struggled to find the right words. “This is a really, really awful idea.” Vhalla felt him stiffen a moment, and he let out a small sigh. “I know.” His voice was barely audible. “I know. Now rest.”