would have stayed off the internet for the rest of my life. I would be one of those people who eats lunch alone in a crowded restaurant without even bringing my phone. I would go on vacation with every intention of leaving my hotel room to learn some of the local language rather than staying inside to watch poorly translated reality television. I would make eye contact and I would bake nut loaf and I would read books, like you are, like some adorable idiot.
