this is how you know i want you.

by AVA.

my hope of all hopes is that your touch has the power to burn my flesh down to the truth of my bones, and i will finally know what being touched means. i imagine your hands, so warm, my heart will believe it is spring, and my heart will bloom wide open for you.

every choice i have ever made after you existed has been dependent on exactly how close i can have you next to me and how long i can get you to stay.

you are an earthquake, a sudden thing. you move and my body shakes. you speak and i tremble. you are a mountain, a stunning thing. you are the sand that's against the grain. you stand and i stumble.

i'm sorry. i don't really know how to be with another person. this is all so new to me. i tend to destroy things i'm afraid of. i tend to destroy things that i love. things i don't believe i’m deserving enough. i am broken and i hope you can understand.

i try so hard not to think about you, not to bring you up in every conversation, not to be one of those people who can do nothing but talk about someone they love. —i'm obsessed. i found you or you found me and i can't help it and i've stopped caring, you make me so happy. i expected nothing and you became everything and this is hard for me to understand. i have never really felt this way and i can't really explain how i feel, i just feel like for the first time ever, everything here is enough.

i say your name and flowers fall from my mouth and fall into yours, and you tell me i taste like spring, like a new day with hints of honey, a bit like chocolate with chili. you say my name and fireworks of wildflowers bloom mad in the sky and a garden grows wild in my heart.