if we grasped a little more the tangled background of misunderstandings, then we wouldn’t feel quite so angry and desperate. It might be that if you could take time to work out what’s actually going on in your mind, you’d discover that behind the anger is a feeling of shame at your own vulnerability; or that behind the impatience is a fear of failure. So politeness doesn’t so much deny what one is genuinely feeling as provide a greater opportunity to discover one’s emotions more accurately.
