Conversations with Friends

by Sally Rooney

At any time I felt I could do or say anything at all, and only afterward think: oh, so that’s the kind of person I am.

Was I kind to others? It was hard to nail down an answer. I worried that if I did turn out to have a personality, it would be one of the unkind ones. Did I only worry about this question because as a woman I felt required to put the needs of others before my own? Was “kindness” just another term for submission in the face of conflict?