In the Distance There Is Light

by Harper Bliss

“I won’t claim that what happened is perfectly normal, because for us, perfectly normal doesn’t exist anymore. Our entire world has been torn down in a flash and all we’re trying to do is make our way out from underneath the rubble. That’s it. By any means possible. What we’re doing now is merely surviving, until we can manage to find some pleasure and meaning in this life again. Which may take a while, months, years, decades. Who knows? But if a kiss can make

you feel a little bit like your old self again, a little more human, a little more than the survivor you are now, then I’ll kiss you every day.” She pauses, starts to say something, then swallows her words.

“Whatever it takes,” I say, while I feel my cheeks flush. “Now will you go to the movies with me this afternoon?” she asks. “On a date, you mean?” My lips curve into a smile. Dolores huffs out a chuckle. “Whatever it takes,” she says.

Grief defines us. It’s all we are, together. That’s how it feels sometimes.

“Not so much responsible, although I do worry about you. I think that’s only natural. But, and I’m guessing this might be mutual, you’re all I have left of him. You shared a life with him. Being around you makes me feel as though a little part of him is still around as well.”

she coaxes from me a pleasure so base, so animalistic, that the world seems to cave in around me as a climax washes over me, starting from somewhere deep inside of me, the place where I’ve been holding all my pain. As I climax, losing control over my muscles for an instant, stepping out of my body while pure pleasure takes over, I let out a guttural groan, one straight from the heart, tears rolling down my cheeks.

But the kind of love that is born from acute need, from kinship, from a pain so ruthless it leaves nothing in its wake.

I somehow feel the need to recognize this as a spiritual moment, of mine and Dolores’ souls joining forces and, entwined, combusting into unfathomable lust. A desire so big, it pushes everything out of my brain but the singular thought of licking her.

I won’t be as gallant as Dolores was with me last night.

“Well, Captain Obvious, thank you so much for that. I really hadn’t figured all that out for myself just yet. I tried, you know, but I just couldn’t get there without your esteemed help.”

The very simple fact is that I fell in love with her. We fell in love with each other.

You must realize, Ian, that what drew me to Dolores in the beginning was her strength. The exact same thing that drew me to you.

“It’s scandalous and delicious and

soothing and healing and glorious and beautiful and important,” she says. “It’s all these things.”