In 2012 I went on The Celebrity Apprentice with Donald Trump, who has hair that looks like cotton candy made of piss. Before the show was over I published my previous book, Every Day Is an Atheist Holiday!, which stated that Donny’s hair looked like cotton candy made of piss. I created the most perfect description of Donald Trump’s hair ever given by anyone. “Hair like cotton candy made of piss” is also the phrase that Trumpy said was his reason for my coming in second a year later on All-Star Celebrity Apprentice. I love that about Trump. He comes out and admits crazy shit like that. He
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