More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
But it’s like my mind and my brain are two separate things, working against each other. I can’t get them to cooperate.
The doc reminds me that fear and rational thought are enemies.
I miss the days when I could have a panic attack in peace.
Sometimes, things are going to happen and the only way out is through.
my brain obviously isn’t willing to believe it.
You can have nice moments, minutes where it shrinks, but it doesn’t leave. It lurks in the background like a shadow, like that important assignment you have to do but keep putting off or the dull ache that follows a three-day migraine. The best you can hope for is to contain it, make it as small as possible so it stops being intrusive. Am I coping? Yes, but it’s taking a monumental amount of effort to keep the dynamite inside my stomach from exploding.
Fragile. Upset. Weak. Thin. Afraid. Failing. And tired. Above everything else, tired of battling with my own mind.
I lack light, am an entire surface area that the sun can’t touch.
It’s about changing the way I think. Which sounds so simple, but whether I like to admit it or not, anxiety has become my best friend. It’s a crutch that helps me hobble through life. It’s the brassy bitch at school that I don’t like, but being her BFF makes me popular. Or the school bully that I don’t really want to be around, but being his friend means I don’t get beat up. I don’t know how to be safe without it. We’re buddies. It’s like they say: keep your friends close, your enemies closer.
We can assume the best, but we can’t choose how people perceive us. We can, however, choose how those views affect us.”
Doubt sneaks up behind me like some horny dude at a disco, its arm snaking around my waist, wrapping me in its cruel embrace.
I cut away the one thing that made me feel like I wasn’t just waiting for death, and I did it because I let my mind run riot.
Your mind adapts to what worse is. Suddenly, that thing that seemed so terrifying at first is dwarfed by the next challenge that comes your way. But you adapt again and again and again, until you find yourself fearless.
