Monogamy tells us what to expect. Polyamory does not. There are no rigid templates, only nuance and shades of gray. This is both a blessing and a curse. Polyamory embraces the idea that relationships are, first and foremost, individual affairs, closely tailored to the specific needs of all the people involved. At the same time, it doesn’t give us a clear path to follow, no royal road to “a good relationship.” Abandoning the benchmarks of monogamy can be scary. Without them, how will we know what to do?
