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The perception of children as tractable has been a hallmark of social justice; it has led us to seek rehabilitation for juveniles rather than simply punishment. According to this logic, a bad adult may be irrecoverably bad, but a bad kid is only a reflection of negative influences, the product of pliable nurture rather than immutable nature. There can be truth in that pleasant optimism, but to go from there to presuming parental culpability is a gross injustice.
doing something terrible does not erase other acts and motives.
If you love someone, you have to love both the good and the bad in them.”
Comparative grief is not a fruitful measurement,
“welcome this pain, for you will learn from it.” But
If God sends us love on earth, I truly believe it is delivered through the actions of people. During
IT’S WIDELY ACKNOWLEDGED among those who grieve that the second year is often worse than the first. The first year, you’re trying to adjust to the newness of the suffering, and to get through the days. It’s during the second year that you realize you’ve lost sight of the shoreline. There’s nothing but emptiness ahead and behind, a vast loneliness stretching out as far as you can see. This, you realize, is permanent. There will be no turning back. My grief was
We ended our marriage to save our friendship,
when our thoughts are broken, we are at their mercy.
It’s dangerous to condition ourselves to view suicide as a natural response to disappointment, when it is really the result of illness.
Asking “why” only makes us feel hopeless. Asking “how” points the way forward, and shows us what we must do.
Origami is not magic. Even the most complex pattern is knowable, something that can be mapped and understood.
