As he listened to her, he saw himself as responsible for changing her negative, unhappy state to a more positive, optimistic one. He believed his role as her husband was to make her happy, so when she was unhappy he would suggest a way that he could solve the problem, and he’d offer how he would choose to feel if he were in the same situation. Sound logical? Big mistake. The man was full of what he saw as sage advice, like, “When the world deals you a bad hand, you just play the hand you are dealt.” The advice did nothing to help his wife feel listened to. On the contrary, it made her feel
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