Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (Harry Potter, #7)

by J.K. Rowling

‘No volunteers?’ said Voldemort. ‘Let’s see … Lucius, I see no reason for you to have a wand any more.’

LMAO

‘I’m talking about your niece, Bellatrix. And yours, Lucius and Narcissa. She has just married the werewolf, Remus Lupin. You must be so proud.’

Dora is her niece?

‘What say you, Draco?’ asked Voldemort, and though his voice was quiet, it carried clearly through the catcalls and jeers. ‘Will you babysit the cubs?’

Yooo HeWhoMustNotShower has jokes today huh

They say, still, that no wizarding duel ever matched that between Dumbledore and Grindelwald in 1945.

Ronaldo v messi ah match up

He knew that the battle was won. If Dudley was frightened enough to accept the Order’s help, his parents would accompany him: there could be no question of being separated from their Diddykins.

Diddy...

‘Er – no, they don’t,’ said Harry. ‘They think I’m a waste of space, actually, but I’m used to –’ ‘I don’t think you’re a waste of space.’ If Harry had not seen Dudley’s lips move, he might not have believed it. As it was, he stared at Dudley for several seconds before accepting that it must have been his cousin who had spoken; for one thing, Dudley had turned red. Harry was embarrassed and astonished himself.

Diddykinsssss he finally came through

Dudley gently released himself from his mother’s clutches and walked towards Harry, who had to repress an urge to threaten him with magic. Then Dudley held out his large, pink hand. ‘Blimey, Dudley,’ said Harry, over Aunt Petunia’s renewed sobs, ‘did the Dementors blow a different personality into you?’ ‘Dunno,’ muttered Dudley. ‘See you, Harry.’ ‘Yeah …’ said Harry, taking Dudley’s hand and shaking it. ‘Maybe. Take care, Big D.’

Took him 7 books but lets go Big D

More Killing Curses flew past Harry’s head from the two remaining Death Eaters’ wands; they were aiming for Hagrid. Harry responded with further Stunning Spells: red and green collided in mid-air in a shower of multi-coloured sparks and Harry thought wildly of fireworks, and the Muggles below who would have no idea what was happening –

TRUEE

‘Bill! Thank God, thank God –’ Mrs Weasley ran forwards, but the hug Bill bestowed upon her was perfunctory. Looking directly at his father, he said, ‘Mad-Eye’s dead.’

Them death eaters got one man. Fairs

‘You lied to Lord Voldemort, Ollivander!’ ‘I did not … I swear I did not …’ ‘You sought to help Potter, to help him escape me!’ ‘I swear I did not … I believed a different wand would work …’ ‘Explain, then, what happened. Lucius’s wand is destroyed!’

NOO OLLIVANDER?!?

They were sitting at the breakfast table; Mr Weasley and Bill had just left for work,

Work?? In this economy?

‘Listen!’ said Harry again. ‘No, Harry, you listen,’ said Hermione. ‘We’re coming with you. That was decided months ago – years, really.’ ‘But –’ ‘Shut up,’ Ron advised him. ‘– are you sure you’ve thought this through?’ Harry persisted. ‘Let’s see,’ said Hermione, slamming Travels with Trolls on to the discarded pile with a rather fierce look. ‘I’ve been packing for days, so we’re ready to leave at a moment’s notice, which for your information has included doing some pretty difficult magic, not to mention smuggling Mad-Eye’s whole stock of Polyjuice Potion right under Ron’s mum’s nose.

Lmao w friends

‘And, of course, you ’ave met my leetle daughter, Gabrielle!’ said Monsieur Delacour. Gabrielle was Fleur in miniature; eleven years old, with waist-length hair of pure, silvery blonde, she gave Mrs Weasley a dazzling smile and hugged her, then threw Harry a glowing look, batting her eyelashes. Ginny cleared her throat loudly.

Oooooooo

‘Wow – that’s right, I forgot! I’m seventeen!’ Harry seized the wand lying beside his camp bed, pointed it at the cluttered desk where he had left his glasses and said, ‘Accio glasses!’ Although they were only around a foot away, there was something immensely satisfying about seeing them zoom towards him, at least until they poked him in the eye.

Nah i wouldve done the same champ. Happy birthday little man

‘This isn’t your average book,’ said Ron. ‘It’s pure gold: Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches. Explains everything you need to know about girls.

imma need this book too big bro

Fred and George bewitched a number of purple lanterns, all emblazoned with a large number ‘17’, to hang in mid-air over the guests. Thanks to Mrs Weasley’s ministrations, George’s wound was neat and clean, but Harry was not yet used to the dark hole in the side of his head, despite the twins’ many jokes about it. Hermione made purple and gold streamers erupt from the end of her wand and drape themselves artistically over the trees and bushes.

Is bro gonna play for the laquerszsz

‘Nice,’ said Ron, as with one final flourish of her wand, Hermione turned the leaves on the crab-apple tree to gold. ‘You’ve really got an eye for that sort of thing.’ ‘Thank you, Ron!’ said Hermione, looking both pleased and a little confused. Harry turned away, smiling to himself. He had a funny notion that he would find a chapter on compliments when he found time to peruse his copy of Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches; he caught Ginny’s

Yo Ronnie, imma need a copy of that book big bro

Harry said, ‘That looks amazing, Mrs Weasley.’ ‘Oh, it’s nothing, dear,’ she said fondly. Over her shoulder, Ron gave Harry the thumbs up and mouthed, Good one.

How much you wann bet either hermiones already read this book or she has a "charm wizards book"

‘That law was created to stop wizards passing on Dark artefacts,’ said Hermione, ‘and the Ministry is supposed to have powerful evidence that the deceased’s possessions are illegal before seizing them! Are you telling me that you thought Dumbledore was trying to pass us something cursed?’ ‘Are you planning to follow a career in Magical Law, Miss Granger?’ asked Scrimgeour. ‘No I’m not,’ retorted Hermione. ‘I’m hoping to do some good in the world!’

COOK THAT BUM HERMIONE

his will are you three. Why is that? To what use did he think you would put his Deluminator, Mr Weasley?’ ‘Put out lights, I s’pose,’ mumbled Ron. ‘What else could I do with it?’

His IQ mightve saved him there

You may wear that scar like a crown, Potter, but it is not up to a seventeen-year-old boy to tell me how to do my job! It’s time you learned some respect!’ ‘It’s time you earned it,’ said Harry.

Yoo HES GETTING COOKED FROM ALL ANGLES CHAT

As Mr Weasley examined the Deluminator for

I keep reading it as the Delulunator LMAO

‘Here – permettez-moi to assister vous,’ to a pair of pretty French girls, who giggled and allowed him to escort them inside.

What a hit son.wht a hit

At that moment, something large and silver came falling through the canopy over the dance floor. Graceful and gleaming, the lynx landed lightly in the middle of the astonished dancers.

Ooooof a silver lynx patronus. Coldddd

Patronus’s mouth opened wide and it spoke in the loud, deep, slow voice of Kingsley Shacklebolt. ‘The Ministry has fallen. Scrimgeour is dead. They are coming.’

Shacklebolt that patronus man that is a ver-WHAT?!?!?!??

‘Yes, I took out all my building society savings before I came to The Burrow. I’ll bet all the change is at the bottom,’ sighed Hermione, reaching for her beaded bag.

Im a muggle and i have no idea what that is mate.. Thats a made up thing

holding the miraculous paper in his nerveless fingers while inside him a kind of quiet eruption sent joy and grief thundering in equal measure through his veins. Lurching to the bed, he sat down. He read the letter again, but could not take in any more meaning than he had done the first time, and was reduced to staring at the handwriting itself. She had made her g’s the same way he did: he searched through the letter for every one of them, and each felt like a friendly little wave glimpsed from behind a veil.

Ahhh

‘Hermione,’ he said, and he was surprised that his voice was so calm. ‘Come back up here.’ ‘What’s the matter?’ ‘R.A.B. I think I’ve found him.’ There was a gasp and then Hermione ran back up the stairs.

Ohh!!

… R.A.B.! The locket – you don’t reckon –?’ ‘Let’s find out,’ said Harry. He pushed the door: it was locked. Hermione pointed her wand at the handle and said, ‘Alohomora.’ There was a click, and the door swung open.

Bro you’d think by 5th year he’d learn at least alohamora

He had never liked Scrimgeour much, but if what Lupin said was true, the man’s final act had been to try to protect Harry.

Redeemed

Yes, Voldemort is playing a very clever game. Declaring himself might have provoked open rebellion: remaining masked has created confusion, uncertainty and fear.’

Chess moves from the GOAT

‘I’d never have believed this,’ Harry said. ‘The man who taught me to fight Dementors – a coward.’

OH SHIT

‘I dunno, some Ministry hag.’ Mundungus considered for a moment, brow wrinkled. ‘Little woman. Bow on top of ’er head.’ He frowned and then added, ‘Looked like a toad.’

Ffs not her man. Anyone but her

A large picture of a familiar, hook-nosed, black-haired man stared up at them all, beneath a headline that read: SEVERUS SNAPE CONFIRMED AS HOGWARTS HEADMASTER.

Woah

‘I don’t know, Harry, I don’t know … there are an awful lot of things that could go wrong, so much relies on chance …’ ‘That’ll be true even if we spend another three months preparing,’ said Harry. ‘It’s time to act.’

Facts. Harry saying the right things this book

‘… I quite understand what you’re saying, Wakanda, but I’m afraid I cannot be party to

WHO?! Wakanda name is that?

‘Harry!’ ‘Hermione, if you think I was going to sit here and let her pretend –’ ‘Harry, Mrs Cattermole!’ Harry whirled round, throwing off the Invisibility Cloak; down below, the Dementors had moved out of their corners; they were gliding towards the woman chained to the chair: whether because the Patronus had vanished or because they sensed that their masters were no longer in control, they seemed to have abandoned restraint. Mrs Cattermole let out a terrible scream of fear as a slimy, scabbed hand grasped her chin and forced her face back. ‘EXPECTO PATRONUM!’ The silver stag soared from

EXPECTO PAAAAAAATRONUMMM

‘He’s fainted,’ said Hermione, who was also rather pale; she no longer looked like Mafalda, though her hair was still grey in places. ‘Unstopper it for me, Harry, my hands are shaking.’

Nahh stop it youre breaking my heart

the elf keep silent or would he tell the Death Eater everything he knew? Harry wanted to believe that Kreacher had changed towards him in the past month, that he would be loyal now, but who knew what would happen? What if the Death Eaters tortured the elf? Sick images swarmed into Harry’s head and he tried to push these away too, for there was nothing he could do for Kreacher: he and Hermione had already decided against trying to summon him; what

Was just about to sayy this.. Fairs they already thought against that

the less sense it made … Voldemort had said nothing about Harry’s wand, nothing about the twin cores, nothing about Gregorovitch making a new and more powerful wand to beat Harry’s … ‘He wanted something from Gregorovitch,’ Harry said, eyes still closed tight. ‘He asked him to hand it over, but Gregorovitch said it had been stolen

Even im confused now

Harry wished he could have another glimpse of the laughing boy’s face. The theft had happened many years ago, according to Gregorovitch. Why did the young thief look familiar?

I only know one blondie..i swear if its him im gonna lose it

He had been sure that Voldemort had been looking for a way round the problem of the twin cores, sure that Voldemort sought a solution from the old wandmaker … and yet he had killed him, apparently without asking him a single question about wandlore. What was Voldemort trying to find? Why, with the Ministry of Magic and the wizarding world at his feet, was he far

The plot thickens

Hermione therefore removed the enchantments she had placed around the clearing, while Harry and Ron obliterated all the marks and impressions on the ground that might show they had camped there. Then they Disapparated to the outskirts of a small market town.

Smartttt

Did you think you’d be back to Mummy by Christmas?’

Lmao. Ron acting like a lil biatch. Old ron would never

‘Yeah, maybe I will!’ shouted Ron, and he took several steps towards Harry, who did not back away. ‘Didn’t you hear what they said about my sister? But you don’t give a rat’s fart, do you, it’s only the Forbidden Forest, Harry I’ve-Faced-Worse Potter doesn’t care what happens to her in here, well, I do, all right, giant spiders and mental stuff –’

First thing he asked was how were thy punished but go off Ron

‘Oh, you’re sure, are you? Right then, well, I won’t bother myself about them. It’s all right for you two, isn’t it, with your parents safely out of the way –’ ‘My parents are dead!’ Harry bellowed. ‘And mine could be going the same way!’ yelled Ron. ‘Then GO!’ roared Harry. ‘Go back to them, pretend you’ve got over your spattergroit and

Like go then..tf??

Hopelessness threatened to engulf him. He was staggered, now, to think of his own presumption in accepting his friends’ offers to accompany him on this meandering, pointless journey. He knew nothing, he had no ideas, and

NAHHH YOU WERE GONNA GO ON YOUR OWN ND THEY SIGNED UP FOR IT.

hilt, a ruby, she moved weirdly: he saw it out of the corner of his eye; panic made him turn and horror paralysed him as he saw the old body collapsing and the great snake pouring from the place where her neck had been.

NOOOO FFFFUUU-

A metal heart was banging outside his chest, and now he was flying, flying with triumph in his heart, without need of broomstick or Thestral …

NOOOOO STAY AWAY

‘He’s coming! Hermione, he’s coming!’

Nooooooo