Arthur Aron, a psychology professor at Stony Brook University, wouldn’t have been surprised to hear Johan’s story. His research has showed that less than an hour of reciprocal disclosure is enough to create remarkable closeness between strangers. On a scale of 1 to 7, hundreds of volunteers rated their “deepest” relationship as a 4.65 for closeness. After talking about their answers to personal questions for forty-five minutes, random pairs rated their closeness as 3.82—not all that much lower.12 The upshot: if you’re trying to build rapport, be willing to reveal a little of yourself.
