The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck: How to Stop Spending Time You Don't Have with People You Don't Like Doing Things You Don't Want to Do (A No F*cks Given Guide Book 1)

by Sarah Knight

I was about as far from self-satisfied and happy as it gets. By the time the Big Day rolled around, I had migraines, a persistent stomachache, and a case of hives the same rosy pink as the floral detail on my gown.

When it comes to how your fuck-giving affects other people, all you can control is your behavior with regard to their feelings, not their opinions. These

you that they represent a very clear and quantifiable allocation of my time, energy, and/or money. I often feel pressure to go to the gym, for instance, and then guilt that I never do. By deciding not to give a fuck about gym-going, I’m liberating myself from those moments of feeling guilty and

Fine, fine, but that was just a random friend of a friend. What happens when a really close friend wants you to donate to something that’s really important to her? This is when you have to dig deep and use all of your tools. Wax on, wax off, paint the fence, etc. (Mr. Miyagi… now there was a guy who gave no fucks.)

If you’re a nonparent, it can be daunting to admit you don’t give a fuck about child-related things. People’s feelings about their children are so emphatic and visceral (and occasionally irrational) that it can be hard to accurately predict whether—in your quest to not give a fuck about toddler birthday parties—you are going to hurt someone’s feelings, or whether that person will accept your difference of opinion and let you off the hook.

your best life. Not giving a fuck—and reserving your fucks for what’s really important to you—is an evolving process. It means prioritizing your fucks based on what comes at you every day. And there are going to be days when

Like the certain (some might say, inordinately large) percentage of your income that automatically goes to taxes, a certain percentage of your fucks go straight to Family. And on top of that, somehow the consequences of those fucks given (or not given) seem weightier than those derived from Things, Work, and Friends/Acquaintances/Strangers combined. It’s like we’re all afraid of being audited by our cousins.