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All I wanted was to be normal.
“Then…you shouldn’t have followed me because…I’m not your problem anymore.”
“But they’re just bananas.” “They’re the fruit of the devil.”
Mainly because I really didn’t need to add breaking and entering to skipping school on the fourth day.
Hopelessness.
“I’m glad we’re here, though, to experience this weirdness.”
The graffiti might just have been letters, a bright flower, a woman’s face or a little boy staring up at the sky with no hope of a different tomorrow, but each piece of art had a story to tell.
In the beginning, when we first met in homeschooling class, she had been incredibly patient with me, drawing me into conversations that most had given up on a long time ago, but each week all of us kids were brought to learn together, she made the effort.
I did want to see more of Rider, especially outside school.
Maybe I wasn’t the only one who still fought that battle.
“It is hard for me to socialize with them, because I’m pretty sure most of them sincerely believe that the First Amendment actually means they can say anything they want without consequences. Like no, that does not protect your butt when you say something ignorant on Facebook and end up getting kicked off the football team or whatever!”
Look, shout your opinions from the rooftops, but please, dear Lord, stop thinking the First Amendment is going to protect you from losing your job or from getting kicked out of a frat house.
I could’ve told Ainsley that for now was pretty darn good. That none of us knew what the future held. That forever could be yanked out of reach.
She was important to Rider.
I had been conditioned to be as quiet as possible. I’d done research on the whole conditioning thing and learned all about Pavlov’s dog. At least I didn’t drool when a bell was rung. I’d just been trained through negative reinforcement to not make a sound, to not be seen or heard.
Rider looked… Goodness, he looked good.
hadn’t knowingly done anything, but she was right in a way. Rider had taken up for me when I left the class, followed me out, and he was here now, willing to do whatever I needed him to do.
The fact that someone trusted a teenager with that was astonishing,
It was the first time I’d spoken to anyone in front of Rider since we crossed paths again.
Rider, he looked half-asleep. Definitely not taking notes. Paige was actually jotting things down. Hector was, well, he was looking at the cell phone he had perched on his thigh.
There was no stopping my smile. It spread from ear to ear.
She had said that Rider had been on a guilt trip for the last four years, and now I could totally see that so clearly.
“Do you feel guilty?”
I wasn’t sure how to feel about that since I didn’t ever expect to see him again, either, but the sense of betrayal was still there, brimming low in my stomach.
“Last Tuesday she was over at Hector’s place and he was asking about you. I was talking to him, letting him know that you were quiet and not very talkative. She must’ve overheard me, because I never told her that directly.”