The Problem with Forever

by Jennifer L. Armentrout

Words were not the enemy or the monster under my bed, but they held such power over me. They were like the ghost of a loved one, forever haunting me.

I was going to give for now a try, myself.

It wasn’t necessarily about the end result, but more about trying.

“You have the power over that. People can say crap. They can think whatever they want, but you control how you feel about it.”

I could become anything. I just had to do it.

sometimes you miss what’s going on around you, because you’re so worried about what others are thinking about you and your choices.”

And it was knowing that I could still be…still be afraid of everything, but not letting that fear stop me from living.

Forever was something we all took for granted, but the problem with forever was that it really didn’t exist.

Forever wasn’t real.

He was all about mental health days. I remembered him ranting once about how if someone coughed, they were given time off from work, but if someone was mentally fatigued, they were expected to suck it up.

The past never went away and it was not designed to do so. It would always be there, and it should be acknowledged.

My past was a part of me and it molded who I was today, but it was not the sum of who I was to become. It did not control me.

all I needed to remember when I felt like not trying was that that feeling wouldn’t last forever.

Forever was my heartbeat and it was the hope tomorrow held. Forever was the glistening silver lining of every dark cloud, no matter how heavy and thick it was. Forever was knowing moments of weakness didn’t equate to an eternity of them. Forever was knowing that I was strong.

Forever was the fire-breathing dragon inside me that had shed the fear like a snake shedding skin.

Forever was a work in progress. And I couldn’t wait for forever.