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June 25 - July 4, 2020
Be there for yourself in the ways you wished your former partner had been.
It’s time for you to give yourself the love, attention, loyalty, and care you’ve been trying to get from others your whole life.
Just because you think yourself to be inferior, damaged, or too flawed to love again, does not mean that it’s true.
It’s one thing to be sad about losing someone you love. It’s another thing entirely to assume you lost that love because you’re fundamentally unlovable.
That you’re not missing your former love as much as you’re missing the person you thought he or she was.
When you have a great pain in your life, you need a greater purpose. MILLARD FULLER
You’re in that nasty in-between place. But don’t you dare get stuck and die in that birth canal. Like a mama on the day of delivery, you’ve got to push yourself out the other side of this.
Yet, here’s what’s more true: as long as your attention stays fixated on what he did or didn’t do that was shameful, wrong, bad, and immoral, you’re not looking to discover all of the covert and toxic ways that you are responsible for the mess you’re in.
Yes, the other person may be messed up. But your primary focus needs to be on you, so you can discover all the ways you set yourself up to repeat these heart-wrenching, painful patterns.
It’s important we learn to look at our mistakes straight on, and let the consequences of those mistakes touch our hearts.
The rule of thumb: you want to be more interested in developing yourself than you are in defending yourself, more interested in being rigorously honest than being right.
For everything you have missed, you have gained something else; and for everything you gain, you lose something else. RALPH WALDO EMERSON
I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. GILDA RADNER
By working with heartbreak, and allowing it to peel away years of unhealthy habits and immature, self-defeating ways of relating, you can transform your anguish into something deeply meaningful that promises to bless you and those you love for many years to come.
After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much.
We’re all a little remedial when it comes to our core beliefs, and even the wisest, most advanced of us can have huge blind spots.
We are disturbed not by what happened to us, but by our thoughts about what happened. EPICTETUS
Trauma has the quality of converting that one sharp stab into an enduring state of mind….The moment becomes a season; the event becomes a condition. KAI ERIKSON
While you can’t keep your heart from getting broken, you can stop breaking your own heart.
Value the learning of life lessons as an important part of becoming a wise and mature human being.
Of all the nostalgias that haunt the human heart, the greatest of them is an everlasting longing to bring what is youngest home to what is oldest, in us all. LAURENS VAN DER POST
I wish I could show you when you are lonely or in darkness the astonishing light of your own being. HAFIZ
Belief: I’m not enough. Truth: My very existence is more than enough to be worthy of great love. I am inherently worthy of receiving respect, honor, and love.
Belief: I’m alone. Truth: I was not born to be alone. I came here to love and be loved, and I have the power to learn how to have happier and healthier relationships moving forward.
Belief: I’m not valuable. Truth: I am a treasure unto all of Life. I need never do a thing to try to prove my inherent value.
Good relationships are about having the necessary development—both inner and outer—to sustain healthy intimacy and goodwill over time between yourself and another person.
Longevity is not the only measure of love.
Releasing a relationship in a way that leaves your heart happy and light, open and free to love again, is a conscious choice you must make a thousand times a day, as you deliberately turn your attention away from the past and make a concerted effort to align your energies with the creation of a bright and positive future.
Keep in mind that the true measure of an individual is how he or she treats a person who can do them absolutely no good. ANN LANDERS
Anger is demanding I stop being so tolerant of being treated poorly.
Whether you meant to hurt your former partner is not the point. That he or she was hurt is all that matters.
“It looks like the end, it seems like a sunset, but in reality it is a dawn.”
Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start. NIDO QUBEIN
When you get stranded, the way to start moving again is not to search for an answer, but to find a new question to which your life can be the answer. JENNIFER KRAUSE
Social rejection—or the feeling of not belonging, of being less than others, unwanted, and an outcast—activates the same brain regions as physical pain.
in meaningful ways for the benefit of another, and not simply a flippant alternative to being lovers.
Just because you can get something doesn’t mean you should.
Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you. H. JACKSON BROWN JR.
God has no hands but ours. DEBRA PONEMAN
Most of all, in the midst of our pain, we strive to do the right thing for the right reasons, allowing our ethics to triumph over our emotions.
