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Zeus needed someone to blame, so of course he’d picked the handsomest, most talented, most popular god in the pantheon: me.
You live your entire life trapped in a sack of meat, unable to enjoy simple pleasures like changing into a hummingbird or dissolving into pure light.
I was one of you—just another meat sack.
I was not going to allow two young mortal ruffians to take Lester Papadopoulos’s wallet.
She reminded me of the strays my sister was always adopting: dogs, panthers, homeless maidens, small dragons.
asking a colorfully dressed street urchin for help.
Zeus did not answer. He was probably too busy recording my humiliation to share on Snapchat.
“As you wish,” I said. “Let’s find Percy Jackson.”
One of the natural consequences of being so awesome is that I attracted envy from all quarters.
“But Percy Jackson has always been reliable. You have nothing to fear. Besides, he likes me. I taught him everything he knows.”
Casa de Jackson No gold-plated throne for guests Seriously, dude?
The Mother of Jackson smiled and shook our hands.
Sally cupped her hand under Meg’s chin. Thankfully, Meg did not bite her.
thought how unfair it was that I was being punished, how lame my father was, how no one else in the history of time had ever experienced problems like mine.
a few minor hardships.
I was impatient with Percy for turning the conversation to himself.
It always disappointed me when mortals put themselves first and failed to see the big picture—the importance of putting me first—
and sort of…blobby.” Percy nodded gravely. “Those are the worst kind.”
“Sure it is,” Percy said. “Some of the best demigods have gotten their start by blowing up toilets.”
they smelled heavenly—and I should know. I’m from heaven.
Percy’s expression turned grim. He faced us. “You hear that, guys? A batch of cookies is depending on me. If you get me killed on the way to camp, I am going be ticked off.”
“This is why you should always plan for my needs.”
Once we reached the Prius, Meg called shotgun, which was yet another example of my unfair existence. Gods do not ride in the back.
I sorely wished I could launch a fireball in front of us and melt cars to make way for our clearly more important journey.
I remembered Achilles falling on the plains of Troy, cut down by an unworthy archer because of my wrath.
It warmed my heart that my children had the right priorities: their skills, their images, their views on YouTube.
He wore faded black trousers, a Ramones T-shirt (bonus points for musical taste), and a black leather bomber jacket. At his side hung a Stygian iron sword.
Will put his hand on Nico’s shoulder. “Nico, we need to have another talk about your people skills.”
Will turned to me. “I apologize for my boyfriend.” Nico rolled his eyes. “Could you not—” “Would you prefer special guy?” Will asked. “Or significant other?” “Significant annoyance, in your case,” Nico grumbled.
“Understood.” Will looked at Nico. “Will you be my buddy?” “You are a dork,” Nico announced.
poked that guy Connor in the eyes.” Chiron winced. “That’s nice, dear….At
Had I still been a god, I would have turned her into a blue-belly lizard and released her into the wilderness never to be seen again. The thought soothed me.
Even the archaic form of communication known as e-mail is strangely unreliable.
“You should assign me easy tasks—like starting a rock band, or just hanging out. Yes, hanging out is good.”
very clear Twenty-Point Plan of Action to Protect Apollo and Also You Other Gods, but he didn’t even read it!”
I tried to figure out how to explain this to Chiron in a calm, diplomatic way that did not involve stomping my feet or screaming.
Long Island Sound glittered in the light of the moon. (Hello, Artemis. Don’t bother to say hi.)
I could see no difference between my table and any of the other gods’ tables. Mine should have been shinier and more elegant.
Will and Nico sat shoulder to shoulder, bantering good-naturedly. They were so cute together it made me feel desolate.
It’s a mood disorder. I can’t control it. That’s what I told Chiron.” “And is it true?” I asked. Nico smiled thinly. “I have a note from my doctor.” Will raised his hand. “I’m his doctor.”
“We’ll watch out for him,” Austin said. “We’re all he’s got now.”
Oh, why does college have to happen to perfectly good people?
When one is a god, the world hangs on your every word. When one is sixteen…not so much.
Will Solace sighed. He was, of course, tied to
Nico. He propped his elbow on Nico’s shoulder as if the son of Hades were a convenient shelf.
should not have been surprised that they were talking about me. For millennia, I had assumed that everyone talked about me all the time.
I was afraid it did not end with we will give him a nice present and send him on his way.
Will changed his surgical gloves and glared at the woods. “We will find them. We have to.” Nico di Angelo gave him a canteen. “Drink. Right now, this is where you need to be.”
Not all monsters were three-ton reptiles with poisonous breath. Many wore human faces.
Could human brains explode from too many worrisome thoughts?
