At one end is a pink-and-green children’s picnic table complete with benches, which adds seating for an additional four. “I like it because when they spill their milk, you just hose down the driveway. Like five of ’em generally spill their milk in a meal.” This strategy has a downside, however. “Somehow, we are a magnet for rats . . . Rats come from all over the neighborhood. They come out and sit right on the table . . . I take my pellet gun, [and] we have fun using the rats for target practice out of my bedroom window!”
WHAT THE FUCK
