Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges

by Amy Cuddy

Anatole France wrote, “All changes . . . have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.”

So we want others to be warm and trustworthy, but we want them to see us as competent and strong. While that first desire helps keep us safe, the latter can lead to costly mistakes.

“Since what we know of the future is made up of purely abstract and logical elements — inferences, guesses, deductions — it cannot be eaten, felt, smelled, seen, heard, or otherwise enjoyed. To pursue it is to pursue a constantly retreating phantom, and the faster you chase it, the faster it runs ahead.” Watts, A.