Collaborative Intelligence: Thinking with People Who Think Differently

by Dawna Markova

Focus on the assets and successes that are present in the room, on what is working and what has worked. Do it in as multi-sensory and experiential a way as possible. • Remember that different people give their attention in different ways. Recall what you’ve learned about mind patterns. Observe the factors that switch people on—i.e., is it standing, talking in dialogue, asking lots of questions? For some it happens when they look right at you, for others when they are looking away. Some find their focus when they’re walking beside you, and for still others it’s when they are engaged in heated debate. This will help you enter the model of the world of those with whom you will be thinking and find the conditions and circumstances where they are naturally fully attentive. Then you can replicate them as much as possible. • Recognize that people have a natural rhythm of “here now, then gone, here now, then gone.” They shift between open and focused attention. This rhythm is different for each person. Sometimes “gone” simply means that a person may be incubating a new idea or digesting what has just happened. • Tell people what you need to be present: “I need to walk while I listen to you,” or “I need you to show me what you mean so I can follow you.” Knowing and naming what you need to be fully present increase your effectiveness. • Be aware that people may feel awkward in a non-habitual thinking environment. You might need to “host”—help them find comfort as you would a guest a...