Borderline (The Arcadia Project, #1)

by Mishell Baker

Before you ask why I was so docile about an invasive request from a complete stranger, keep in mind that I’d spent the past year of my life following the orders of a procession of doctors, therapists, and other random concerned people whose names I sometimes didn’t even bother to learn.

I was gonna wonder that.

the 10,

lol, Californians

“Residence Four? Out of how many?” “Three.”

-___-

I stared back at her. Was I hearing this right? Nice new job you’ve got here. Shame if something happened to it.

This is a cult.

“Fuck that. I’m not going to tell some British lord or powerful space dude to pack his bags and go home, not without some idea who I’m speaking for.” “First off,” said Teo, “‘space dude’? Your second guess after England is outer space?

Legit

“All of them? You’re saying Martin Scorsese hangs out with fairies?” “Yup. Not all fey are sunshine and rainbows.” “Kubrick, Eastwood, Coppola?” “Kubrick’s before my time, but probably. Eastwood and Coppola, yeah.” “Spielberg?” “He doesn’t need one; he’s a wizard.”

LOL

“I have a steel plate in my head,” I said slowly. “Also various nails and pins and things holding my bones together.” “Holy shit,” said Teo. “Steel. That’s what happened with the drawing. All that iron . . . You kill magic.”

:(

“My father is Czech-Indian and my mother is of Moroccan Berber descent, if that satisfies your need for ethnic categorization.”

Heh

She looked up at me, and her eyes were so nakedly terrified I actually took a half step back.

P sure Elliot holds all her emotion

This woman, her former patient no less, had torn her mind in half. Her Emotion Mind was perched on my shoulder while her Reason Mind drove the car and told me it didn’t matter. It was fascinating and horrible, and I was deeply, sickeningly envious.

Wow yup

“You know how this works,” she said calmly. “Once you’ve engaged in a target behavior, it’s too late to call me for coaching. I have to end the call now.”

That seems... odd?

Caryl thought it was her fault, Millie; she was raving some crap about a fight you two had. She was crying.” “Bullshit.” “She’s like a ten-year-old inside, and she worships you, thanks to that stupid movie.”

Hwaet.

“You don’t have to apologize. I just want to know why you jumped.” “It was a rough year. I’ll leave it at that.” “You don’t have to leave it. I actually want to hear. Do you think I’m going to judge you or something?”

WHY SHOULD SHE TELL YOU ugh dude what

“I wish I could tell you,” he finally said.

Is cop boy her Echo?

I should have been disturbed to know that Rivenholt had somehow managed to observe me without my seeing him, but I wasn’t. I had no room to question his motives; I’d felt them. He respected and cared about me on a level that didn’t make any sense, given that I had no memory of meeting him.

Weird.

Then, “We have no officer by that name. Did this person specifically claim to be with the LAPD?” The bottom dropped out of my stomach. “He did.” Too many paradigm shifts in one hour; I was getting queasy.

BRUH

“Nineteen,” Caryl said. Yet another moment of everyone watching me react to something they already knew. I looked at Caryl’s impassive face. She had no visible lines around her eyes or mouth, but in L.A. you can’t read by that sort of thing. She dressed old. Sounded old.

What.

A cherry-red 1967 Plymouth Valiant convertible—the cherry-red 1967 Plymouth Valiant convertible that David Berenbaum had been driving since, well, 1967—gleamed like imminent sin at the curb. It had been the hero car in six films, two of which Berenbaum didn’t even direct. He was really pulling out all the stops to cheer me up, and I couldn’t begin to wrap my brain around why.

I am also curious and it is creeping me out.

That silenced me, and I just sat staring at this icon of a man, realizing how very far I was from understanding him.

You and me both, sis

What was his deal with me? Teo and Gloria had good reason to dislike me, but I’d never been anything but civil to Tjuan.

I'm pretty sure you're an unreliable narrator, dearie.

“It’s Ironbones!” she said in delighted surprise, as though I had not identified myself at the buzzer. “What a terrifying honor! Would you like to come in for sex and oranges?” I’ll confess I missed a beat. “I’m honored by the invitation,” I said solemnly, “but we’re just here to chat.”

LOL

I looked over at Teo. He was watching us intently, but more like he wanted to take notes than join in.

I've headcanoned Teo as ace until someone tells me otherwise

“Why does Tjuan hate me so much?” Teo stared at me for a second, then laughed. “You’re kidding, right? The dude’s got massive trust issues. When I first moved here, it took him three months to even answer when I said hi.” He shook his head, walking away. “Not everything’s about you, mija. Really gotta get that into your head.”

Fair

In case it isn’t clear, this was not a victory. I’ll admit, there are few highs quite like using words to turn your enemies into a stack of bloody cubes. But then you cool off, and that stack of minced flesh doesn’t just hop back together into a whole person. Long after you quit feeling that glorious rage, your words linger.

No kidding, damn.

“It’s okay in this town to believe that crystals can heal asthma or vaccines cause autism or an alien overlord is going to give you special brain powers if you pay enough, but I say the J word and suddenly I’m crazy.”

Okay, fair.

“It’s you,” Inaya was whispering. “The angel. It’s you.” “Is it you?” Foxfeather asked in an equally awestruck tone.

AHAHAHAHAHA of course

“They’ve literally just turned it sideways,” said Caryl, her voice soft with horror. “A tunnel they can’t climb out of, and they’re forced into continuous contact with it. If they were human, they’d have gone mad within a few hours.”

Was the one above her bed not sideways like that?

“Fey can’t go mad?” “Fey are mad already.”

WELP

It was Teo who went completely batshit. “You said you wouldn’t hurt anyone!” he screamed. Vivian smiled. “I didn’t hurt her. I hurt the rope.”

Oh shit.

“I’m sorry,” David whispered. “I’m so sorry for all this. I just wanted to make great movies again; I didn’t know they were people—”

Because torturing dogs or monkeys is fine? Dude.

“You don’t feel it,” he said. His eyes reminded me of the well I’d found him in. I shook my head miserably. “I’m sorry,” I said. “I . . . care about you, and I think you’re . . . amazing. God, that drawing, I can’t tell you what it meant. But when we met, it wasn’t—it wasn’t like the thing I saw with Inaya and Foxfeather.”

Alas