When God Doesn't Fix It: Lessons You Never Wanted to Learn, Truths You Can't Live Without

by Laura Story

Were we supposed to be like the Noah who had the courage to build an ark when it wasn’t even raining? Or like the Noah who got drunk after dry-docking the ark and was discovered by his sons lying naked in his tent? Were we supposed to be like the David who defended God by using his slingshot to kill Goliath? Or like the David who took a census that resulted in sev...

Were we supposed to be li...

the faithful father, willing to sacrifice his own son at God’s command? Or Abraham the faithless liar, who tried to save his own skin by misrepresenting his relationship with his wife (twice) and having an illegitimate child with ...

Did you know all of that is in the Bible? The Bible is filled with rapes, murders, betrayals, child sacrifices, and other atrocities. Reading Scripture will reveal that heroes of the Bible are broken and morally depraved people. Just like we are. Abraham lied more than once. We’ve sinned repeatedly and unrepentantly. David coaxed Bathsheba into cheating on her husband. But look at u...

and his family by getting drunk. We’ve promptly forgotten his provision for us because we get drunk w...

With that understanding in mind, I went back and looked at some of those heroes of the faith, and I discovered that God didn’t call me to be like them. And he doesn’t call you to be like them either. He never asks us to be like Noah, David, Daniel, or any other biblical example—except Jesus.

Be obedient like Jesus, who was obedient to the Father. Be prayerful like Jesus, who sought solace to talk to his Father. Be willing to be used like Jesus, who took the punishment for our sins by his crucifixion, death, burial, and resurrection.

Their stories aren’t in the Bible because these characters are heroes. Their stories are in the Bible because God is the hero of their stories.

January 15, 2013, I played one of the most meaningful events of my career. Several Christian

Newtown, Connecticut. This was a month after the Sandy Hook shooter took twenty-six precious souls and left our nation speechless. It was a great honor to be asked, but it was also one of the hardest events I’ve ever played.

On the way in, I met a first responder. He told me he was at the school ten minutes after it happened. I couldn’t imagine what he saw in those classrooms and hallways, or how it had haunted him every day. I had no words of comfort for him. I just cried with him. As we gathered together to pray beforehand, Mark Hall with the band Casting Crowns commented that this was the first time all of these

The nation was heartbroken and so were we, but we were there to provide hope. While each of us did the best we could, none of us knew what to say. But there was one person who did . . . About halfway through Steven Curtis Chapman’s set, his wife, Mary Beth, got up to speak.

Steven and Mary Beth have six children. The three oldest are biological children and the three youngest were all adopted from China. In May 2008, their five-year-old daughter Maria Sue was accidentally killed when she was struck by an SUV in the Chapmans’ driveway. As Mary Beth took the stage that night, she knew firsthand the grief the audience was feeling. She understood the unexpected timing and horror of it all. She had been living with loss and the ensuing depression for nearly five years. She took the mic and said, “I know you feel like you’re not going to make it through this. But you will. God will carry you, because God carried me. I didn’t think that God could bring me through it, but he has.” Of all the people who spoke that night, Mary Beth was at the mic for the shortest amount

of time. She will tell you she is not really a speaker, but she did what none of us could do. And if I tried to quote her exactly, I couldn’t do it justice. Tears are the most vivid memory I have from that night. But when she spoke, a hush fell over the room, tears fell, and God used her s...

“Mary Beth,” I said, “I hate your story! I wouldn’t wish your story on anyone, not even my worst enemy. Yet there is no one in this room who could deny that God used it in such a powerful way tonight to introduce people to the hope that can be found in Jesus Christ. God has used your story to minister to this whole community in a way that none of the rest of us could have. Because you’ve walked through it, you can giv...

What trials are you walking through? Could God be using your trials to better equip you for his work? What brokenness are you experiencing? How can God redeem it for his glory? In every trial you experience, he is closer than you ever could imagine. He doesn’t leave us or forsake us. We’re often afraid that sharing our story will lead to isolation. The truth is, not sharing our story leads to isolation. I started this chapter by saying: “Everything I know about God I learned from stories about his people.” Like David’s story, sometimes those life stories came from the Bible. But often, the stories where I learned about God’s comfort, provision, love, protection, and power to redeem came from friends, family, people I met at church, and hurting people I met on the road while traveling. Like the woman who had the abortion and started a ministry for others who’d also had abortions. Like Renee and Elaine, who bonded over an

introduction. Like the pastor who started a group for parents of children with addictions. Like my friend who faithfully served before, during, and after her divorce. And like Mary Beth Chapman. I wished my story had started with, “I won the lottery!” and ended with, “And we lived happily ever after.” But that is not a story that God can use. And to be honest, is that a story that would comfort or inspire you? The heroes of the faith I grew up learning about weren’t heroes because of their stories; they were heroes because they shared their stories. The only thing we’re called to emulate is their dependence on God. In our worst trials, and especially in our extreme brokenness, God is the only hero of our story. And that is a story worth

God deserved my worship, even in my brokenness.

Jesus doesn’t raise everyone from the dead. He raises believers from the dead to spend eternity in heaven with him and God the Father.

I PRAY EVERY DAY THAT GOD WOULD COMPLETELY HEAL my husband. If you could overhear my prayers, they’d sound something like this: Good morning, God. Is today the day you’re going to heal Martin? Because if you heal him, I promise to give you all the glory. Every time I pray that prayer, I feel as if God responds in the same way in my heart: I know, Laura. I know you will. But what if the healing is a process? What if it’s going to be a long road that requires more sleepless nights than you’ve ever imagined?

Or what if it requires more faith than you ever thought you had? Will you still give me all the glory?

knows from experience. A few years ago, he lost his young daughter, when his son accidentally discharged a pellet gun and shot her. I can’t imagine the horror their family has gone through, but he said they are doing remarkably well despite the tragic circumstances. He wrote, “This may sound strange—I wish my daughter were here right now and none of this had happened, but I’m so thankful for the amazing growth that God has provided. I’ll never be the person I was before, but now I have a heart for the suffering that drives me each day.” Despite his own tragic circumstances, he believes his suffering has changed him and helped him to grow closer to God. If he believes that after all he’s gone through,

then how could I believe anything less?

Even though our situations aren’t going to get better, there are ways we can get better. Our marriages can get better. Our relationships with our children can get

better. Our attitudes can get better. Our grief can get better. Our intimacy with God can get better. Though we’re still broken, it can be a better broken. So how do we do that? I don’t know. Unfortunately, there is no single, easy answer to find purpose, meaning, and even joy in your trials. I’d be a fraud if I tried to offer you a seven-step program, a learn-by-example program, or any other kind of program, because there isn’t one. I didn’t write this book because I have ten easy steps to happiness or a quick fix for whatever ails you. Each of us is broken in different ways. Our trials and our circumstances are unique. What we have to individually figure out is what it looks like for us to get better even when our circumstances don’t. Now, before you get frustrated that you’ve shelled out money for this book and spent hours of your time reading this far only to find

don’t have all of the answers, let me explain. We’re never going to have all of the answers this side of heaven. The Bible doesn’t promis...

Whether it was our need to control or assign blame, our selfishness, or our pride, sin was the real problem. The disability

wasn’t the problem; it was just the mirror to our sin. Disabilities don’t cause relationships to fall apart; it’s how our sin manifests itself in that disability setting. But as long as we blamed all of our problems on something that was broken and couldn’t be fixed, we didn’t have to deal with the problems. If Cindy and I had stuck around the radio station a little longer, I would have told her what this looked like in our marriage. For example, some days Martin asks me the same exact question five times in a row. When he does that several times a day, it makes me want to punch my fist through a wall! For years, I blamed my anger and mounting frustration on his disability. So did he. If only he were healed, we’d think, we wouldn’t have these problems in our marriage. We’d get along better as a couple. Nothing could be further from the truth. If he didn’t have memory problems, I’d

still have a sin problem, and I would just get annoyed at him...

To be better in our brokenness isn’t to remove the brokenness; it’s to remove the selfishness, pride, impatience, or other sinful behaviors we blame on the brokenness. When we stop blaming our situation on the brokenness, we begin to see that the brokenness is a trial designed specifically for us. Now don’t mistake

Joy doesn’t come from our circumstances; it comes from our God. And since God is with us during our trials, it is possible to have joy even in our trials. Joy is in the Lord. Brokenness is in the world. As long as we’re alive, both will coexist on earth.