“Hmmm?” is just one of many phrases that can rapidly defuse a conversation that’s escalating. Others include: “Really?,” “And so . . . ,” “Tell me more,” “Then what happened?,” and “What else can you tell me?” Of all these, “Hmmm . . .” is my favorite opening line because it catches people off guard—and catching people off guard is a good way to stop a meltdown. Move a person from hostility to mild confusion and already you’ve moved one step in the right direction.
