We think we are loving, but in reality we may be seeking another form of conformity. We say “I love you” when really we mean “I see me in you”, “I will become you”, or “I will possess you”. In loving, we try to lose our uniqueness, or steal it from the other person. Our yearning to exist “as one” makes us want to see ourselves reflected in other people, which in turn leads us to artificially impose our own traits onto someone else.
